AmericanBkkpr

30+ Years of Numbers in Squares.
Sharing the cr@p I see in the tax biz.
Living the dream.

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@ScottPresler Um no. No it isn’t. You are much better spoken and much better looking.

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@Nickisbackbaby We all need more Jesus

[Brandon Gill @realBrandonGill]

Why would Democrats not be able to win elections if only American citizens are allowed to vote?

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@RepJeffries When illegals can’t vote and can’t receive benefits then they will stop buying houses here which means less competition and lower house prices. See how that works? Dumbass.

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@GavinNewsom Was Biden your political opponent?

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@GavinNewsom Are you really this stupid that YOU of all people are talking about fire disaster aid after ZERO $$s from the fire aid concert ended up in the hands of actual fire victims??? But your freshly created NGO received millions? Really? Dumbass!

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@RicardoEtano @GrahamAllen You’re ** a dumbass.

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@howertonjosh @TheLiveFreePod Yes!!!!!!

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@GavinNewsom Except the data does lie if you’re not actually calling things what they truly are. We’ve seen that play already.

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@GovTimWalz Where are the American children Timmy?

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@GovPressOffice @CAgovernor Cool. Then after they are certified the penalties can be greater on those that helped perpetrate the steal!

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@alihadi68 @NYCMayor lol. This didn’t age well. Muslim on Muslim crime.

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@Selene_Mariposa If you lived closer we might be besties! A song popped in my head reading this….sing.sing a song. Sing out loud. Sing out strong! (That’s all I remember.) I was blaring Metallica and Josiah Queen from my 700hp CTSV. I’m 56. Never stop singing!

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@GavinNewsom Poor Gav. Such a loser.

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@Selene_Mariposa Same here.

[ARMY1325AIR @army1325air]

If you followed me today? Perfect. Slam that notification bell because I am about to commit a hate crime against feelings.

I am about to make the anti American crowd sob so hard their therapist will need a therapist. These people wake up mad at a flag. They hate apple pie because it is problematic. They think the Pledge of Allegiance is a microaggression.

They spend every sunrise to sunset dragging this country through the sewer calling us colonizers racists genocidal maniacs while typing it all on a laptop built in China sipping a 9 dollar latte from a company that pays zero taxes wearing sandals made of recycled yoga mats.

And yet they are still here.

Not in North Korea. Not in Iran. Not in Venezuela.

Here. In the land of the free. Whining about how unfree they are.

You know why they stay? Because everywhere else would eat their gluten free soy based non binary lunch in about 45 seconds. They would get canceled by a dictator before they finished their first complaint tweet.

These are people who call the troops war criminals but cry when their Amazon Prime is late. They chant defund the police then dial 911 when a stray cat looks at them wrong. They want open borders but gated communities. They want equity but not effort. They want change as long as someone else pays for it.

They are not revolutionaries. They are toddlers with Twitter accounts. Emotional support animals for each others delusions.

So today on the Fourth of July while they are busy burning flags and drafting their next America is trash manifesto I will be over here grilling burgers drinking bourbon and thanking God I was born in the one country stupid enough to let these whiners run their mouths for free.

Happy birthday America. You are not perfect but you are perfect enough to make these crybabies absolutely lose their minds.

Now hit like share this with your most unhinged friend and watch the comments turn into a therapy session.

God bless America. And God bless the tears.

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@GovPressOffice It’s $3.39 today in Texas.

[AmericanBkkpr @AmericanBkkpr]

@SenSanders It must suck for you to be such a loser Bernie

[Selene Mariposa @Selene_Mariposa]

America turns 250 today.

Let me read back the resume.

We started by telling a king to pound sand, in writing.

By 1803 we bought half a continent from France for about four cents an acre.

We fought a war with ourselves and somehow stayed one country.

We strung a railroad across the entire thing.

We handed the world the lightbulb, the telephone, and the airplane in about thirty years flat.

Then a man named Willis Carrier invented air conditioning and made half the planet actually livable.

You are welcome, Texas. You are welcome, Dubai.

Twice the whole world caught fire, and twice we showed up and helped put it out.

We split the atom.

We put men on the moon in 1969.

Then we went back and hit golf balls up there, because why not.

We invented jazz, blues, rock and roll, and hip-hop, and the whole planet is still dancing to it.

We put a burger and fries on every corner of the earth.

We built rockets that fly themselves home and land standing straight up.

We flew a helicopter on Mars.

We launched a car into actual space and it is still out there cruising.

We also invented ranch dressing and somehow talked the entire world into putting it on pizza.

Priorities.

We even invented three of our own sports so we could win them.

Baseball, basketball, and football.

Real football, the kind with hands, because we named it and we are not taking corrections.

The rest of the planet can keep soccer, which is fine, we are hosting it in our backyard this summer anyway.

And yes, Canadian football exists, wider field, extra man, one fewer down, and we try very hard not to think about it.

Frankly it was generous of us to invent our own games.

If we put all that energy into soccer, nobody else would ever lift that trophy again.

We would win it so often they would just rename it the America’s Cup and hand us the keys.

You are welcome for the suspense.

And in 2026 we threw a birthday so big a German tourist live-tweeted our gas stations to 750,000 people.

Not every chapter was clean.

We argued, we stumbled, we fixed what we broke, and we kept building.

That is the whole trick.

Two hundred and fifty years in, and we are still the loudest, brightest, most improbable experiment on the map.

Not bad for a country that started as a strongly worded letter to a king.

Happy birthday, America.

🦋