Angelos Fake Restaurant

Serving up homemade pasta, patriotism, and COVID gelato. Masks = Tyranny. (PARODY)

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

We talked tough, but at the end of the day, we crumbled like a stale biscotti.

We are weak. @SecretaryLevine and @GovernorTomWolf are strong. We bow to their dominance like the frightened plague rats we are.

#reopenPA #COVID19

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

@RealMattCouch @MetalEinstein20 We are proud to be #American and #Christian. We are also proud to be standing up to the tyranny of @GovernorTomWolf by continuing to serve up homemade pasta and crippling viruses.

Plus gelato, don't forget the gelato.

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

@MetalEinstein20 @JoeBiden We are so busy running a first-class restaurant that we didn't even pay attention to your eloquent words. However, we'd love to have you in for dinner and disease at your earliest convenience. No masks required- ever!

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

Did you survive Christmas? We can fix that. Come on in for our dine-in service because we're cooking up freedom aggressively seasoned with our secret ingredient that may or may not have been imported from the exclusive Wuhan region of China. #WuhanVirus #reopenPA #COVID19

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

@PGHCityPaper @RyanDeto @magweav @LeoGreta_ That meatball looks like trash. If you want real Italian cuisine with none of those pesky masks, come on down and see us. We've replaced all of the pepper in our grinders with hydroxychloroquine so we can put it right on your pasta as God intended.

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

Hey @bethanyhallam how about you come down to Washington County and enjoy some of our famous "Pasta and Plague" special? As a special treat, we're rolling out our new gelato flavor- "Hydroxychloroquine Hazelnut Heaven". Are you in? #watchbethanyeat #watchusgivebethanyCOVID

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

Hey @realDonaldTrump could you please add our owner Michael Passadacovid to your #pardon list? If we stay open it's just a matter of time before some socialist loser who can't handle a little COVID with their calamari is going to kneel over.

[The New York Times @nytimes]

Breaking News: President Trump gave clemency to Paul Manafort, Roger Stone, Charles Kushner and other loyalists in a new batch of pardons and commutations.
https://t.co/7JIWoFVueQ

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

We would like to formally invite @LLinWood to come to dine in our fine establishment because we love to serve up our fine Italian cuisine to patriots. Will you please come and visit us as we fight for freedom one noodle at a time?

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

Uh oh, someone tried to get us in Twitter trouble so we had to put "fake" in our username, because apparently so many of you #reopen idiots couldn't tell the difference.

Just for that, we're gonna have all the working guys in the kitchen pee in the sauce.

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

@MantisToboggan6 @DorothysRubies We're not going to be lectured about fake profiles by "Mantis Toboggan" which is literally a fictional character played by another fictional character.

#Loser

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

A special message from our owner, Mike Passadacovid:
"We are staying open for indoor dining because regular folks like me are hurting during the #COVID19 pandemic. If we can't #reopenPA then I could fall behind on my yacht payments. Remember, takeout is #socialism."

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

@GReschenthaler God bless you, @GReschenthaler. Feel free to stop down to our restaurant for your usual order of 4 lbs of pasta and a dozen meatballs.

As always, no shirt or mask required for you, Congressman.

#COVID19 is a hoax, right?

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

Why are so many people so angry? We're just here to make sketti and infect people, and we're all out of sketti.

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

@POdPatriot We ain't here to cause no trouble. We're just here to do the COVID Shuffle!

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

@IEPattie You had better be praying. We're effectively raw dogging the public down here.

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

@tom_zeni @KDKA Why do you hate freedom? Maybe you need one of our Sundried Tomato, Spinach and #COVID19 flatbreads.

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

@VSNPenn Thanks for your support. The more people who help us get the word out, the more people we can get infected with #COVID19! We're serving up #HerdImmunity with a side of pasta!

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

@Mellon56 @realDonaldTrump @MariaBartiromo Thank you for supporting freedom! Please stop by our restaurant for a free plate of sketti and COVID-balls!

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

@KingDrue17 If you need more cake, please consider ordering our delicious double-decker chocolate torte. The top layer is @LoveGhirardelli and the bottom layer is pure #COVID19-laced buttercream. Get yours now!

[Angelos Fake Restaurant @AngelosWashPA]

Well that didn't take long. What happened to freedom, @FightingBackPa?