Crab Ride Goon

Head Strength & Conditioning Coach, Redwall Abbey

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

Hello Shane, these are my two Division I conference championship rings. I would ask to see yours but idk if they have a program at clown college

[Shane Sparks @ShaneSparksBTN]

@FrogsStalingrad Says the guy who hides behind a Twitter handle….

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

@w0a0i0f Me? I'm wondering if she can do rhetorical tricks on it, can't speak for anyone else

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

Though I will say if you listen to audiobooks at any speed faster than 1x you will be denied entry to heaven and that's out of my hands

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

I am a lone and vicious samurai in an eternal battle with "audiobooks are reading" people

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

Important to note that: nowhere in this did I say "audiobooks are bad" or "audiobooks do not help people with disabilities" or any number of strawman points which you would be able to internalize as spurious if you read more,

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

@gabrielfairman Yeah it would have fucking sucked dick dude

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

@useriousguy I could defeat you in any physical or intellectual contest

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

I'm sorry but this is bullshit. He would either catch himself saying what's up doc or say some shit like enchanté

[7/11 Truther @DaveMcNamee3000]

Jensen Huang: hello beautiful

Bugs bunny in drag: hello Jensen

[7/11 Truther @DaveMcNamee3000]

Jensen Huang: hello beautiful

Bugs bunny in drag: hello Jensen

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

@PusheenRage https://t.co/FWLeLrjgrH

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

@rhprocter @ScaPhil52392 "ingesting information" isn't all that reading is

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

@ScaPhil52392 If a teacher reads you a book at school before you are literate are you reading???? What are we doing here?!

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

We need to end millenial capitalization. I'm turning in my shift key as we speak

[Grime Square @grime_square]

our new columnist says that we're in "Late Stage Hinge"

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

I walked to my first day of elementary school with my mom and neighbor and we never did it again but I still think about it all the time

[kenzie @wongkarwasian]

Right it's not helpful to childhood development or independence to be able to navigate the world without relying on an adult at all

[gabriel 🔻 @BotchedBladeJob]

Karl Greco-Malenko and Josh Barnett are probably the only two possible figureheads I'd trust in America to present Shootstyle the right way.

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

@tony_m_papa Listen kid I'm busting my buns out there on defense every night

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

@dee_of_e You forgot to use the chain rule ‼️

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

Next time you think a bear hug is a hokey spot remember this

[Big Ten Wrestling @B1GWrestling]

Antrell Taylor wasn't messing around 😲

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

I used to teach at a university that had them in the campus cafes and I drank one every day for a semester

[bing @bangbowbing]

vietnamese coffee feels like theres a number above your head counting down and its getting faster

[Crab Ride Goon @AngusLegstrong]

It's actually significantly closer to saying rub a dub dub thanks for the grub

[Beachmaster @b3achmaster]

You can tell localisers are full of shit because itadakimasu is never localised as saying Grace even though it's the cultural equivalent.