multifandom // he/they // 25+ ~ non rompetemi il cazzo con i drama di merda, che vi blocco subito ~ buddie, but also everything else ~ multifandom pinball
This is maybe gonna get me cancelled, but; sometimes, when I see a fic AU with a great premise but execution that doesn’t scratch MY specific itches, I’ll take a stab at writing a version that gives me what I want. Not bc I think that I can do better, but bc MORE CAKE1/2
If generative AI vanished from the world I legitimately would not notice until someone told me, nothing about my life would change, at all. And if you think I'm implying that this makes me superior to people who now rely on AI for everything, it's because it does.
One of the hardest lessons I'm still learning is that you don't necessarily get rewarded for effort. As an Autistic and ADHD person who spent the first 20 years of my life undiagnosed, I would always give 110% and wonder why there were people more "successful" than me who didn't need to put in the same amount of effort. Which leads me to the other big lesson life isn't fair. I'm still trying to wrap my head around that one.
My office got fake plants. I was put in charge of "maintaining" them.
They're PLASTIC.
Week 2, coworker: The plants look great! What's your secret?
Me: They're fake.
Coworker: Still! You have a gift!
Week 4, EVERYONE was complimenting the plants.
Me: They're literally plastic!
Boss: Your humility is refreshing!
Month 2, I was promoted to "Office Plant Wellness Coordinator."
With a RAISE.
Me: For FAKE plants?!
Boss: You've created a calming environment!
Me: By dusting plastic?!
Boss: However you do it, keep it up!
Month 4, other departments requested my "expertise."
Department Head: Can you consult on our plant situation?
Me: They're fake. Just dust them.
Head: writing notes, "Just dust them." Brilliant!
Paid me ¥50,000 for that advice.
Month 6, I was SPEAKING at a conference.
"Sustainable Office Greenery Solutions"
Me: They're fake plants. You dust them once a week.
Audience: applause
Someone: What about REAL plants?
Me: Too complicated. Stick with fake.
Audience: standing ovation
Month 8, I wrote a BOOK.
"The Fake Plant Method: Low Maintenance, High Impact"
Publisher: This is genius satire!
Me: It's not satire. It's instructions for dusting.
Publisher: Even BETTER!
Sold 60,000 copies.
Month 10, I'm on TV.
Host: You've revolutionized office environments!
Me: I dust plastic plants.
Host: So inspirational!
Me: That's not..
Host: Tell us about your JOURNEY!
Me: I was assigned fake plants and told to maintain them!
Host: From humble beginnings to plant guru! Amazing!
Present day, I make ¥4 million/month.
From fake plants.
Have a TEAM now. We consult for offices across Tokyo.
Client: How often should we rotate them?
Me: They're FAKE. They don't need sun!
Client: *writing* "Rotate monthly for even aesthetic distribution."
Me: That's not what I...
Client: You're a genius!
I've stopped correcting people.
The fake plant empire is too big now.
Neurodivergent people often crave clarity because we grew up navigating invisible rules that everyone else seemed to understand instinctively. Clear expectations feel like safety when ambiguity has always carried consequences.
in che senso ho letto che la r0wling non è “davvero” transfobica e che se la odi sei misogino 😭😭😭 cosa deve fare per convincervi che è davvero transfobica nn capisco uscire di casa armata????
softcore | #buddie#911twt
10.3k | rated e | no warnings
- established buddie
- fluff and smut
- dry humping, thigh riding, body worship
- just eddie loving buck no matter his size
📎 https://t.co/ViSXiMhnQJ
One of my weirdest fandom lores is that one time a fanfic writer had to delete their entire online life because they were writing fanfiction while actively undercover as a detective and got busted.
One of the most painful things that’s happened to me as a neurodivergent person is having my excitement treated like something embarrassing. After enough eye rolls, jokes, or dismissive reactions, you stop sharing the things that light you up. You get a new job, finish a project, reach a goal—and celebrate quietly, because your joy no longer feels safe in other people’s hands.