Lance's Bike

Hello. I am Lance Armstong's bike. I'm here to tell you my side of the story.

OFFICIAL ACCOUNT of Lance Armstrong's Bike.

[Richie Benaud @Richiebenaud1]

Currently enjoying this parody account: @DGoughie. Worth a follow. RB

[Lance's Bike @ArmstrongsBike]

@PhilLiggett Cyclepath @Richiebenaud1 #OneWordCommentator

[Richie Benaud @Richiebenaud1]

Describe a commentator in one word and I'll RT the best ones using #OneWordCommentator RB

[Richie Benaud @Richiebenaud1]

In this competition England are the weather men. First it rains, then it Hales. RB #EngvSL

[Lance's Bike @ArmstrongsBike]

I don't think Lance loves me any more. We don't go out like we used to. I think he might have tyred of me.

[Oscar's Legs @OscarsLegs]

The only red carpet my Oscar has seen is the one in his bathroom #Pistorius #Oscars2014

[Sunil Benaud @SunilBenaud]

Missing: chicken escape farm! Reward: first 10 eggs laid. Please RT @thehinduexpress

[Lance's Bike @ArmstrongsBike]

@FreedmanDennis Agree! I hate the feeling of cock and balls on my saddle.

[Richie Benaud @Richiebenaud1]

Why is Santa such a bad bowler? Because his deliveries go everywhere. RB #XmasCricket #Ashes

[Lance's Bike @ArmstrongsBike]

Bless my saddle, @Richiebenaud1 killed Brian!

[Richie Benaud @Richiebenaud1]

Who would make your #Ashes #illXI ? RB

[Richie Benaud @Richiebenaud1]

For a man of my years, "ashes countdown" is a very sinister phrase. RB

[Lance's Bike @ArmstrongsBike]

I've seen Lance in the locker room, believe me, you don't want 100% transparency. It's not a pretty sight.

[Richie Benaud @Richiebenaud1]

AP McCoy has had 15,000 rides and in those, 1,000 falls. That's less than Ashley Young in a normal season. RB

[Richie Benaud @Richiebenaud1]

I categorically deny trying to run down Billy Birmingham. The fact he was standing next to that wall when I crashed was a coincidence. RB

[Lance's Bike @ArmstrongsBike]

Get well soon to @Richiebenaud1's car

[Lance's Bike @ArmstrongsBike]

"@Richiebenaud1: To celebrate Halloween I am giving away 10 of these super spooky masks." here's a mask @maskmaker

[Richie Benaud @Richiebenaud1]

Congratulations to the first winner of the free copy of #GTAV- @ArmstrongsBike. For the next chance to win, RT this. RB

[Richie Benaud @Richiebenaud1]

I have 10 copies of #GTAV to give away. To enter simply RT this. RB

[Lance's Bike @ArmstrongsBike]

You know how riders say they need to get back in the saddle? Well, I need to get back between the buttocks.