Baby Pawsey

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

As of today I've finally spent more time outside Mom as I did inside.

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

@Shopify thanks for the sweet onesie!

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

Lately some strange monster has been flipping me from my belly to back while I'm sleeping. Quit it, it's scary! #StartedRolling

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

@MilestonesCa Mommy @iheartmykitties , Nanna, and Aunt @jackieCstephens did seem to really enjoy their bottles. I should try that red milk!

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

Went to dinner @MilestonesCa . I don't get the big deal, my bottle tasted the exact same!

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

I'm batman!

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

Cried so hard mommy turned off #TheBachelor and went to bed. Now I'm quiet and Dad and I are watching the #bcschampionship . You owe me Dad!

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

Ever have to fart so bad you scream for an hour straight? Not sure why dad kept trying to feed, change, bounce, and burp me. What a weirdo!

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

Things outside the womb are strange; why did you change years after only 44 days? How the hell will I be as big as dad in only 1320 days!?!

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

Distracted the caretakers while they were checking out at the store today; they ended up stealing 48 rolls of toilet paper. #100%off

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

#TBT when I had foreskin. Traded my turtle neck for a storm trooper helmet! By the way, when does that grow back?

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

@BabyBakus I've blasted mom, soaked the wall, and hit the nurses shoes. Dad blocks it and laughs while I get soaked. I'll catch him one day!

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

@alexbakus why do you think I was trying to eat dads arm? After those swole gains bro.

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

I don't see why the servants get warm showers behind fancy curtains while I get publicly stripped and doused in the kitchen sink. #Bullshit.

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

If anyone in #Ottawa is looking for a buffet I highly recommend "Mommy".The options are limited but it's free, she delivers, and wipes butts

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

Met the great grand parents today; they seem cool. This one hasn't grown out his hair yet. I hope I get mine quicker.

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

@DerekPawsey whatever Dad, you know I can only see like 11 inches away. What I CAN see is that I need to be changed. Chop chop, man servant!

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

Got confused and tried to breast feed from @DerekPawsey arm today. Pretty embarrassing, hope he doesn't make it a big deal.

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

@alexbakus @doulapantry that might be a good idea. Daddy's hoping she'll get a third booby, like in Total Recall, that also dispenses beer:)

[Baby Pawsey @BabyPawsey]

Fun Fact: The @EdmontonOilers haven't won a game in my lifetime. Dad says they were great when he was my age but that was last millennium.