Keith Burgess

I have a brain, and sometimes that brain tells my hands to mash about on a keyboard, and then stuff like this happens.

[Keith Burgess @BadhandBurgess]

@hardwick I feel like this is something one of your ancestors would have written.

[Keith Burgess @BadhandBurgess]

The most beautiful cinematography and most disturbing sound mixing on television NEEDS A NEW HOME. PLEASE NETFLIX, PLEASE. #Hannibal

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

The universe is really, really big

https://t.co/4j3jvIaqpe

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

Rocket made it to drone spaceport ship, but landed hard. Close, but no cigar this time. Bodes well for the future tho.

[NASA @NASA]

#Orion traveled 60,000 miles + farther into space than any ship for humans has gone in 40+ yrs!

[Philae Lander @Philae2014]

I’m on the surface but my harpoons did not fire. My team is hard at work now trying to determine why. #CometLanding

[Philae Lander @Philae2014]

.@ESA_Rosetta See for yourself! ROLIS imaged #67P when we were just 3km away! Glad I can share. #CometLanding

[Philae Lander @Philae2014]

Touchdown! My new address: 67P! #CometLanding

[Keith Burgess @BadhandBurgess]

Sometimes you see an idiot driving an idiot-mobile and you just want to vandalize it. Unfortunately I'm not like that.

[Keith Burgess @BadhandBurgess]

There is nothing wrong with rice pudding.

[Keith Burgess @BadhandBurgess]

Just kidding, I love hockey. Because I'm Canadian.

[Keith Burgess @BadhandBurgess]

I have to drink beer and watch hockey tonight because I'm Canadian.

[Keith Burgess @BadhandBurgess]

I think my father is in love with popcorn, and that's kind of cute.

[Keith Burgess @BadhandBurgess]

"YOU. You're a fucker I bet aren't ya?" - Drunk man talking to lobsters in a tank.

[Night Vale podcast @NightValeRadio]

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender is also a horse. Every human is a horse now. Our lives are simultaneously more & less complicated.

[Keith Burgess @BadhandBurgess]

My favourite angsty teenager quote would of course be the exaggerated "my life is OVER."

[B.J. Novak @bjnovak]

Speed skating looks too casual

[God @TheTweetOfGod]

Bieber stays American!

[Keith Burgess @BadhandBurgess]

Holy crap guys. THE MOON. LOOK AT IT.

[Keith Burgess @BadhandBurgess]

It looks like there's a lot of manure on the ice in the harbour.