Kristy Beer

Coffee Addict. Titanic Nerd. Simpsons Quoter. Phone Junkie. Bad Mum.

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

@Solfisk Maccas is Australian.

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

@JebraFaushay I still do this every time I have a client being a wanker over the phone at work!

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

@Trudgin @implausibleblog No, he’s a fucking idiot.

[Olena Rohoza @OlenaRohoza]

“AND YOU STILL DARE TO OPEN YOUR MOUTH…”

Sasha Legerman: This is too accurate not to share.

This Australian’s response to Trump’s rant that “NATO does nothing for America” is absolutely devastating:

“Mate. You run a country where 600,000 homeless people will sleep on the streets tonight.

A country where 40% of adults can’t cover a $400 emergency without borrowing money.

A country where insulin costs more than a car payment, and people ration it just to stay alive.

A country where medical debt is the number one cause of bankruptcy.

A country where women die in hospital parking lots because doctors are too afraid of abortion laws to treat miscarriages.

You imprison more of your own citizens than any country on Earth.
More than China. More than Russia. More than North Korea.

In the land of the free, 2 million people sit in cages, and a quarter of them haven’t even been convicted of anything.
They’re simply too poor to afford bail.

Your life expectancy is declining. You’re the only developed nation where that’s happening.

Your infant mortality rate is worse than Cuba’s.

Your children practice active shooter drills between math and English classes while you sell defense stocks to your friends.

Your minimum wage hasn’t changed in 15 years.

Your teachers work two jobs, your veterans sleep under bridges, and you just spent a trillion dollars flattening a country that never attacked you.

And now a convicted criminal — found liable for sexual abuse, defending a pedophile, sleeping with a porn star, and running the biggest dumpster-fire campaign since the Taliban — is thanking you for yet another disaster.

And you call Greenland badly governed?

Greenland has universal healthcare. Free education. One of the lowest incarceration rates in the world.
Nobody there goes bankrupt because they got sick. Nobody dies in a waiting room because insurance refused treatment.

‘NATO wasn’t there when we needed them.’

When exactly was that, champ?
September 11?

Because NATO invoked Article 5 for the first and only time in history FOR YOU.

Soldiers from dozens of countries deployed, fought, bled, and died in Afghanistan FOR YOU.

Australia wasn’t even in NATO, and we still showed up. For twenty years.

And then you left at 2 a.m. without telling anyone and left everybody else to clean up the mess.

You don’t care that a great nation is being terrorized by your friend, and you haven’t shown it a single ounce of sympathy.

So maybe before calling other countries badly governed, take a look at your own backyard, you aluminum siding salesman with a spray tan.

The only thing badly managed in this picture is your damn mouth.

And you still dare to lecture the rest of the world?”

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

@RealEmirHan I use this clip during my onsite fire training to both a) make an extremely boring training session a little more fun and b) bring attention to the fact that without training, chaos ensues. 🤣

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

A-fricken-men!! Got the exact same phone and LOVE it - which is hilarious as my previous posts will show my absolute hatred for this thing. Now I think it’s stunning and modern. And I will never go back to a pro max size again 6.3 is perfect 👌🏼- especially for anybody with small hands like myself.

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

@Marks_Tech Omfg the morons in this feed Mark! No wonder I’m not a content creator! I couldn’t handle the sheer stupidity!
Love your clapbacks! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

@buitengebieden My favourite Aussie bird - though a tree of them at 5am in the morning isn’t fun, loud buggers. But they are beautiful, bold and brash birds who eat snakes and steal snags off the barbie - and don’t give a fuck if they annoyed you. 🤣

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

@kojrey_codes @buitengebieden Nah Black Cockatoos are the sign it’s going to rain.
Kookaburras mean somebody’s cooking a BBQ somewhere and they are looking for snags to swipe.

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

@washghost1 This is wrong?! Cause that’s how I do it except the final fold is in 3s not 2s. Waaaay easier doing it this way.

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

@landofthe80s Wait…I’ve seen that before… 🫪🤯

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

Came here to say this. The shoes with the hooks that came up through the floors were invented and used after this film clip and so they collect it in live shows. During the making of this clip the men were held up by strings.
Still the **Best** Michael Jackson music video - even better than Thriller.

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

@soliloquillxo Is that Jerry Seinfeld’s Shmoopie?

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

@Captain_Chaos_X @midcoast1

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

@Captain_Chaos_X @midcoast1 This whole thread:

[Jenny Fay @jenny_fay16]

@atrupar

[Kristy Beer @BeerKristy]

@Marcela252016 Gertrude.

[Canada Hates Trump @AntiTrumpCanada]

I hate Donald Trump so fucking much. He’s the biggest piece of fucking shit this world has ever seen. The planet will instantly be a better place once his bloated fucking carcass leaves it.