Billy Ryan

Mental Performance Coach, Aware Performance Group

[Monday Q Info @acaseofthegolf1]

Mini-lumpy wins a three for one playoff and is in the John Deere Classic.

[Steven C. Hayes @StevenCHayes]

Willingness doesn’t mean liking it. It means saying yes to discomfort when it’s in service of something that matters.

[Billy Ryan @BillyRyanPsych]

I’m thankful to be featured as a speaker on the Expanding Psychological Flexibility Summit, where over 40 experts in psychological interventions teach innovative approaches to help your clients. To access the Summit and 30 days of PsychFlex use https://t.co/SVKzXBLMms

[Billy Ryan @BillyRyanPsych]

@acaseofthegolf1 What hole did they start on?

[Billy Ryan @BillyRyanPsych]

@Mike_kim714 Again, if this is the case why can the majority of players with the “yips” perform just fine with their excellent technique in practice but not in competition? What changes? The technique or the context?

[Billy Ryan @BillyRyanPsych]

@Mike_kim714 If this was the case, that these 2 processes (fully committing and acceptance) are all you need to know about the mental game, then why are most golfers so heavily interested in improving their mental game?

[TONY™ @TONYxTWO]

Special moment for this WWII Veteran visiting Utah Beach (Normandy) for D-Day’s 80th Anniversary 🙏🏼

We salute you sir and thank you for your service 🫡🇺🇸

[Billy Ryan @BillyRyanPsych]

@sweatystartup A lot of them would rather strive with thousands, with risk, to actualize their skills, rather than be a part of the millions sitting in a cubicle solving boring problems. They are aware of their choice and frankly don’t need a business coach telling them what they already know.

[Billy Ryan @BillyRyanPsych]

@acaseofthegolf1 @VBChampionship @SeanWalsh_14 getting it done 💪

[Billy Ryan @BillyRyanPsych]

@acaseofthegolf1 Let’s go Jack 💪

[Billy Ryan @BillyRyanPsych]

@acaseofthegolf1 Have they started the playoff yet for the -6’s?

[Adam Grant @AdamMGrant]

Suppressing stressful experiences doesn’t build resilience. It drains resolve.

Stifling unpleasant thoughts and emotions saps energy, limits support, and raises the risk of rebound later.

The best way to cope with distress isn't to ignore it. It's to acknowledge it.

[Jason Helmes @anymanfitness]

Just finished this book - Bad Therapy by @AbigailShrier

This is one of the most eye-opening books I've ever read. It's a must read for any parent, any teacher, and should be required reading for any school administrator as well.

The book dives into trying to figure out why kids are having so many mental health problems, when there are so many resources devoted to improving mental health outcomes.

Anxiety, depression, suicide, etc are all higher than they've ever been with kids, even though their lives are arguably better than ever before. It just doesn't make sense.

A few key takeaways from the book:

A constant attention on how kids are "feeling" or "thinking" is causing negative outcomes.

Constantly ruminating on your emotions and how you feel negatively impacts your mental health. If all you do is focus on your emotions, you are destined to be anxious or depressed.

We incessantly ask kids how they're feeling, if they're happy, how their mental health is, etc, and this is creating kids who think they're fragile instead of resilient.

Trying to solve every problem for kids has caused a generation who can't do anything for themselves.

We (Gen X) were told to "suck it up" or "you'll live" or "rub some dirt on it" all the time. Many of us came to the conclusion this is "bad parenting" because our feelings were neglected, and we vowed not to do this to our own children.

Because of that, kids immediately over-dramatize everything that happens to them, making mountains out of molehills, and thinking the world must revolve around their emotions and feelings.

You develop confidence and strong mental health by doing things, not by thinking or via therapy.

You can't think your way out of anxiety. You don't gain confidence by analysis of your thoughts or mental health issues.

You gain confidence and eliminate anxiety by doing gradually more difficult tasks, excelling at them, and realizing you are a competent, capable person.

The non-stop attention therapy gives to these small, common emotions we all feel blows them out of proportion to their seriousness (not talking about genuine disorders here, just normal anxieties that millions of people go to therapy to try to avoid).

One of the best ways to decrease your happiness is to chase it.

Our society constantly tells kids they should be "happy" and asks them if they are.

Happiness isn't a state you should be in 24/7. That's not realistic. Joy and bliss aren't permanent states - they are fleeting.

Contentment, stillness, and being even-keeled are much better goals to aim for mentally.

The happiest, most well adjusted kids come from families with loving parents that have strict rules for the household.

This one really set off the confirmation bias in me... I feel really blessed we have 2 well adjusted middle school kids who do great in school, are very respectful and well mannered, and we barely even need to parent them.

But for years, we were very strict with them. Bedtimes, family rules, how we do things, etc. The in-laws and lots of friends thought we were totalitarian.

In reality, we just had high standards. And it's really paying off right now. I found it really interesting that strict rules equals happy kids. Makes sense, though, as kids need to know what their boundaries are.

Constantly surveying school-age kids about their mental health causes more issues than it solves.

Mental health resources is big money. Districts need to validate all the resources allocated towards mental health, and they often do that via surveys.

Asking kids non-stop questions like:

- Have you thought about self harm?
- Have you thought about suicide?
- Have you been so anxious you can't get out of bed?

Etc, etc puts into their heads the idea that themselves, or many of their peers are broken and cannot function properly in the real world.

It normalizes situations that would be incredibly rare at any other time in history.

There's a lot of other takeaways, too, but I'll stop there.

It's a fantastic book. Go pick it up and read it. This isn't an affiliate thing or a promotion thing at all. I just really enjoyed it, and it will further shape the way I parent moving forward.

[Steve Stewart-Williams @SteveStuWill]

“[V]ery few people show a complete lack of belief in superstitions and practice none... Anxiety and uncertainty are associated with practicing, believing, and the discrepancy between them.” https://t.co/ud9UrgdF4N

[Billy Ryan @BillyRyanPsych]

@dailystoic Overcome anxiety for how long? 5 minutes? For life? Anxiety isn’t a problem to be eliminated, it’s a feeling, just like happiness. Seeking happiness, just like trying to eliminate anxiety, have approximately 0 positive outcomes.

[Billy Ryan @BillyRyanPsych]

Don’t try to control your thoughts and emotions.

Try to not be controlled by your thoughts and emotions.

#awareperformancegroup

[Billy Ryan @BillyRyanPsych]

@hubermanlab @michaelpollan “Beware of unearned wisdom” - Carl Jung

[Billy Ryan @BillyRyanPsych]

@JonathanShedler Are you familiar with ACT research? In particular the Death Star project?

[Billy Ryan @BillyRyanPsych]

@JennyShin_LPGA https://t.co/AAjwkdvAlJ

[Billy Ryan @BillyRyanPsych]

Does your skill in tournaments look different than practice? It’s logical to think that feeling calm will lead to playing better, but it’s not psycho-logical. Forcing yourself to be relaxed is like forcing yourself to be spontaneous, it just doesn’t work that way.