Bitchy McSnipe™

Sharp tongue, sharper wit — just
thriving in my thirties.

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

If whoever designed the Chick-fil-A drive-thru process was in charge of our nation's response to Covid 19, this mess would have been over in a month.

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

The phrase "It is what it is" is such a cop out.

The truth is it is whatever you're ALLOWING it to be because you don't have the stones to discuss the issue like an adult.

So you're right; It is what it fucking is, coward.

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

By all means, please continue to show me exactly why I never should have liked you in the first place. #YoureCrushingIt

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

I want that this song reminds me of you, can't stop staring at you with that goofy smile, saw this and thought of you, tucks your hair behind your ear, got you flowers just because, carry you to bed when you fall asleep on the couch, literally can't get enough of you type love.

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

It's always the self-proclaimed 'good guys' who wind up being the worst. The actual good guys never have to say it because their actions say it for them.

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

I don't think dogs have any idea how much their short time with us on this Earth colors the brushstrokes that fill the canvas of our lives.

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

I will never develop a skin thick and calloused enough to withstand the sting of loyalties and affections that shift as easily as the wind. For that I am grateful, for it is my ability to feel the pain and despair that allows me to truly know and appreciate the experience of joy.

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

People are so rarely who we want them to be and even less often who we need them to be.

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

Isn't it funny how the greatest work always seems to spring from the tightly clenched jaws of the deepest sorrow?

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

Oh wait, there it is again. That familiar sinking feeling when you realize you never meant as much to them as they did to you; that palpable lump in your throat stiff with regret. This stale homecoming is worn and stretched in all the right places; it's solitude oddly comforting.

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

@DammitErin Rotini for life! 😅

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

Anyone else upset that, based solely on the information provided by the trailer, the new Netflix movie The Power of the Dog appears to have nothing to do with actual dogs? #IFeelMislead

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

@LeeRoyExMachina 😂 I've never experienced a bidet

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

Alligators can live for up to 100 years which is why there is higher than average probability that they will in fact see you later. #TheMoreYouKnow

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

@LeeRoyExMachina See now, being a brat about it only intrigues me further...🤔 *Quietly wonders why I'm like this*

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

@LeeRoyExMachina I can't figure out if this is sarcasm, flabbergasted disbelief, or ironic ball busting since that in fact was a 'response to a comment.' Lol 🤔

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

Anyone else wish the book version of All Too Well from Taylor Swift's new music video was real? Personally, I would absolutely devour that book and I'm not even embarrassed to admit it. 🤷🏼‍♀️ #SwiftieForLife

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

@Eionnah You get me! Lol

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

Therapist: What can we tell ourselves to comfort ourselves when we feel like this?

Me: Stop being such a little bitch!

Therapist: *Sighs heavily*

[Bitchy McSnipe™ @BitchyMcSnipe]

Hope is a tricky business. It can be the fire that keeps you moving forward when everything inside you wants to give up or it can be the hand that won't let go until it drags you down to burn along with it. #DeepThoughts