Brian McKee

I’m here to chew gum & have a few laughs…and I’m all out of gum.

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

Elect me for Supreme Chancellor and I’ll bring back institutions for the unwell, execute heinous criminals, and make the planes/trains run on time! Oh, wait…

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

Welcome to 2026 in America, where asking for “light ice” at Starbucks is taken as some sort of political statement.

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

@Irina_exh Sorry, I’ll be far too busy watching grass grow.

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

THEM: He’s so rich now, he could give out a million dollars and that would really help all the homeless people.
REALITY: To do what, exactly? If a million dollars were spread equally amongst each homeless person in America, they wouldn’t have enough to buy a pack of gum!

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

Ain’t nothing but straight lines on that there pride flag. What’s up with that?

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

@adamcarolla I dunno…it seems like a success story for them!

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

@choeshow Gross.

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

@BrandiKruse So glad I work all day to not only barely survive, but so that I can help fund Seattle’s rolling urinals. 😡

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

@FoxNews He’d be in a barrel if it were me.

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

@paratroopbrady Invite him in for a spot of tea and some crumpets.

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

@ClownWorld I would assume cross-wearers would have understood Jesus’ thoughts on theft…

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

@ShawnGarrett I hope he likes trains, ‘cause he’s gonna be Bubba’s li’l red caboose down at the joint!

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

@CollinRugg Have fun in prison, idiot!

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

@OliLondonTV Look, kids…it’s an anthropomorphic heroin vial!

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

@ClownWorld How much do lead projectiles cost?

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

@GeeScottSr @NFL @druski You nailed it, Gee. That was just…ugh…SMH!

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

Drug cartels and narco states only exist because there is a (mostly American) market for their products.

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

@GeeScottSr So much YES!!! Thank you!

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

We’re all idiots!

[Brian McKee @BlueBandit92]

@elonmusk Brought too light of a wallet to the dealer!