Ben Devitt

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

https://t.co/BedSrEnKUL

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

@rickygervais In a state of confusion?

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

@rickygervais Kansas?

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

Elon Musk is a douche. He wants free speech here, the same way Putin wants Russia to have free and fair elections. It’s all words, but when thin skinned “leaders” feel the burn in their direction, they start shutting it down.

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

@kiwijennyc @LoneWolfTronCat It takes forever to finally reach a level of financial security to provide for a family, which is something that we’re raised to have expected of us. A young wife is less likely to experience pregnancy issues, and the energy to mother. Just a guess. My wife is 4 yrs older than me

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

@JoeListComedy I’ve been listening to your specials over and over, lately. You’re fucking awesome, Joe.

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

Does anyone else think “prime minister” sounds thirsty?

“Girl, that is one PRIME minister!”

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

@rickygervais I’ll take 3 thumbs, so I can do more believable magic for the kids. *pulls off thumb* “Here, hold this… ta-da!” *wiggles both remaining thumbs.

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

Pro tip: Improve your dead lifts by purchasing a hearse.

It’s a serious undertaking

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

Do a rail, be a rail, right? 😅

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

Fun fact: 1980’s LA fitness was originally called “Doing Coke.”

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

Medieval royals and rednecks are the same in that , “he’s like a brother to me,” makes it somehow more acceptable.

Rednecks can’t afford crowns though.

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

@francisgcomedy Then the second part is a more obvious tag, as well. Just a thought. Take it or leave it. 👏🏼

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

@francisgcomedy This is good. It might land even better if you switch it a little. “I’m so bad with money, that all I can save is a bank balance screenshot.” That puts the punch at the very end.

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

@luisjgomez This feed is chalk full of misogyny. Like, holy shit! Try and help anyone who’s being assaulted, if you’re able. Based on what I’m reading here though, a lot of the guys here need their own help. Jesus!

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

I’m often told not to sell myself short, but my genetics didn’t give me a choice.

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

@jokedoctor Share a bed

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

@RedSoxwinszn @SagED_UP Haha! I’ll take it.

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

@StradBandoMan I don’t even owe an explanation! 🤪

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

I wrote a book about feeling
like you're owed everything.
It's entitled…

[Ben Devitt @BlueBennysJokes]

Am I the last to learn that a rump roast isn’t about mocking a cows ass?