Went to buy my usual pepper and tomatoes today and immediately noticed how small the quantity was.
I had to increase my budget and asked the seller to add more because what I was getting for the same money made no sense.
Only to get home and open Instagram to see your president saying the economy has recovered, agriculture is booming, and food is now everywhere.
These guys live in an alternate universe
American: So there are terrorists causing problems in your country, right?
Nigerian: Yes.
American: That's terrible. Is the government at least doing something about it?
Nigerian: Well, our president addressed the issue.
American: Oh. What did he say?
Nigerian: He spoke about the law of lawf in the holy book
American: ...The law of love?
Nigerian: I guess
American: Okay. Did you send the military after them?
Nigerian: Hmm... at times.
American: What do you mean "at times"?
Nigerian: Sometimes we've heard the military went after them. In some cases, the terrorists ended up killing military personnel.
American: Wait. They killed your soldiers?
Nigerian: Yes.
American: Okay, so then your government retaliated and finished them off, right?
Nigerian: Mm... nah.
American: What do you mean "nah"?
Nigerian: Well, our president also gave an example from the Bible about the prodigal son on how we should accept them with love.
American: Hold on. The prodigal son?
Nigerian: Yes.
American: I'm confused. So you're telling me terrorists killed military personnel, and the response was a Bible lesson?
Nigerian: Something like that.
American: So you guys aren't doing anything?
Nigerian: No, no. We're doing something.
American: Okay. What are you doing?
Nigerian: We're rehabilitating the ones we catch.
American: You're... rehabilitating them?
Nigerian: Yes.
American: Not prosecuting them?
Nigerian: Not according to our president, no.
American: WTF WTF WTF
Nigerian: I never even tell you anything, you don dey cry
Omo! Do you people know how insane it is for terrorists to kidnap a retired general, kill him and then return his body in a handover ceremony where they took pictures knowing they'd leave unchallenged?
Do you people know what kind of trouble we are in?
Bandits went live and asked Nigerians to send azas for give aways.
They used banking apps to send money to those who sent accounts. No arrests made.
A responsible citizen made a video of the cracks on Coastal road and within days he was arrested.
If you ever come here to tell me only God can solve our insecurity problems Ogun will kpai you.
I just saw a kidnapping video that happened in benin yesterday, 11am in the morning. Husband escaped, wife was taken by the kidnappers and their children were in the car crying. I just hope that woman is safe,I always get so scared when women are kidnapped, because I know what they go through in the handsome of those men
Tomorrow is the feast day of St Anthony of Padua. They will share bread during mass. I repeat, dem go share bread during morning mass tomorrow. You know what to come with. I said lemme drop update for you people.
Why would any decent Nigerian want to enter public service?
See the way Peter Obi is being torn apart like he is the one squandering their money๐คฆ๐พโโ๏ธ
Are we ok?