Bread McNaughton 🥞

I check Twitter about as regularly as I clean behind my oven. If you need to reach me I'm always at

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

Me on Twitter discovering new friends with similar interests.

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

@WhofanRachel Interesting new fact! I feel like Mini World would have been hype destination for kids in the late 80s. Do you still have your teeth?

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

https://t.co/sVSVcied7V

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

Sometimes I feel like a God but most of the time I feel like a furless monkey.

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

Mood

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

TWO WEEKS UNTIL CHRISTMAS is over.

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

Lessons learned from being a teleworker: try and fit a walk in everyday, don't grow a moustache, don't eat cereal for every meal of the day no matter how tempting it is, claim random things on tax, try and do at least two walks on the days you eat five bowls of cereal.

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

If you've got proof then I'm your pudding.

[Andromeda Spaceways Magazine @ASIMtweets]

We’ve caught up on our submissions and are OPEN once more. Get your stories in! https://t.co/rk5c1dSWtq

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

If you find yourself asking "What is all of this for?" the answer is: to distract ourselves from asking "What is all of this for?"

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

@selfpluspen On average, yep.

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

How do you feel seeing a two metre tall man measure out twelve grams of almonds?

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

Miya Folick's cover of I Will Follow You Into The Dark is phenomenal!

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

Two self-aware bags of meat and gas doing something as complicated as radiography and replacing the tiny nerve pulp inside a goddamn tooth's canals with a chemical adhesive solution, snoring, gurgling and digesting all the while.

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

Is it weird that I nap through root canals, teeth cleanings and other dental procedures? You lie down on a chair and you don't have to talk for up to an hour, why wouldn't you drift off to sleep?

The only problem this morning was

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

and his rumbling bowels once or twice chimed back in something almost like a harmony.

And I thought, as I drifted back to sleep again, how utterly human that was.

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

@writelikeashark Ouch :(

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

Is it weird to nap during a root canal?

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

@writelikeashark Oh yeah I forgot you're English 🧐

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

@writelikeashark Have you ever fallen asleep in the dentist's chair Joe? Without gas?

[Bread McNaughton 🥞 @BradMWriter]

@writelikeashark I was like, do I make this tweet question really specific or do I leave myself open for this comment?