BrokenRites

Divorced/separated ex-wives/husbands/partners of clergy: supporting each other & calling for better support of ministers' families before/during/after breakdown

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

https://t.co/f1VJSiGiVI

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

@CofESurvivors @RevJodyStowell @GenSyn Whilst not wanting for a minute to quibble with the rules, one can only imagine, at this time when it's hard enough to pay anyone to work in church safeguarding, what a challenge it must be to find volunteers!

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

@MadsDavies Yes it was good to hear her getting some airtime

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

@HumanistQuaker See you there

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

Eager to be outta here now; been torn for some time between ethics & anxiety about losing connections with you all. Looks like the exodus is gathering pace...
Setting time limits so forays elsewhere don't eat too much of our lives.
Follow the butterfly?
#Leavingx #leavingtwitter

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

@aboveeg @FrDidymus Perils of late-night Xing. Sorry!
I think we didn't just learn anti-C of E snobbery; we picked up an ungodly attitude that any not-like-us were inferior. As those who have "moved on", do we still carry our sense of superiority with us?
The "?" is cos I think I do; idk about you!

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

@FionaNaylor2 @FrDidymus You been spying on our exes?

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

@Ian_Gomersall @HannahBarraclo8 Unfortunately, (a) many stories are hard to anonymise & our loved ones are too much at risk, and (b) many of us remain in survival mode, too busy surviving to be inclined to help the church to sort itself out. We've tried. They didn't listen.
Good idea tho...

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

@PaulNeedle1 @InesonMatthew @ChurchTimes A wider view is a luxury of those who haven't spent years having more 💩 piled on them. I hope the answer is yes, but where is the justice in that for those traumatised & retraumatised again & again?

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

@alexdjfrost @churchofengland An admirable sentiment, & I don't doubt that there are good ppl working in SG.
Can't help thinking this is a great example of those who have a voice not lending it to those who are silenced, though?

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

@WATCH_ACT @churchofengland @BishopNewcastle @MartineOborne Don't get us started on #coercion & #Gaslighting

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

"Church ministers tend to live permanently at the outside edge of their emotional capacity", as those who live with them will testify. Families often get caught in the crossfire at church & suffer collateral damage at home when the brown stuff hits the fan.
Disastrously for many.

[Marcus Honeysett @marcushoneysett]

I was at a brilliant day yesterday on the subject of criticism

A few thoughts 🧵

Nobody handles criticism constructively when they are at the limit of their emotional capacity

Church ministers tend to live permanently at the outside edge of their emotional capacity

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

@AndrewGraystone Thanks for keeping on saying it

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

@irefuteitthus @SewellMartin Or rallying a long and arduous pursuit of justice, against those who colluded in causing harm to many, to prevent further harm?
We don't do pitchforks. We're just grateful to see transparency and accountability being defended as, right now, many people's wounds have been reopened

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

This

[Margaret Wilkinson @Margare68227107]

While our focus is on those abused by John Smyth and the church’s response to the Makin report, we must also remember that there are many other victims of church related abuse who have been adversely affected by the same kind of response when disclosing abuse

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

#SelfPityPost Spare a thought please, for all the spouses who have spent years trying to rebuild their lives, & their kids', after so many other scandals, real or averted; botched disciplinaries; "don't ask don't tell" situations, & tragic mistakes. It opens it all up again.

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

@Crowe_JE @AndrewGraystone As single parents with kids of different ages, many of us owe a huge debt to #YouthWorkers & clergy who did prove worthy of our trust, & whose work was key to setting our teenagers on the road to independence.
I think we're not seeing the common ground we're standing on here

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

@Margare68227107 @IsabelHardman Yes, we'd love to connect with you about this. Do get in touch any time [email protected]

[Isabel Hardman @IsabelHardman]

One thing I mention in the post but don’t go into great detail on is the irony that women who left abusive relationships were more stigmatised within this world than powerful men accused of abuse https://t.co/5s0MUNJzsS

[BrokenRites @BrokenRites]

@MoorlandsColl 👍
Any input to address the pressures on marriage & family life?
Any offers to support spouses?