InVerseYieldCurve

Talking finance and markets, VC to Vanguard // All through rhyming and verse, I’m your I-Banking Bard

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

So to capture the ethos, I think to myself
I'll write something timely, about drugs and then greed:
You've heard the tale of elf on the shelf
Now it's Madoff on speed, #SamBankmanFried

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

A pretty long time since my last creation
But its Christmastime now, a time of elation
For some anyway, but others are bitter
At inflation, or crime, or @elonmusk buying @Twitter
It feels like our spirit is fatally flawed
Driven by anger at malice and financial fraud

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

The past couple months have been quite a ride
@federalreserve raising rates, @SpeakerPelosi trading inside
It's not easy to know where to invest
If you're making money you probably guessed
You can bet on one thing though, @jimcramer's the guy
When he says sell, just BUY BUY BUY

[unusual_whales @unusual_whales]

An inverse Cramer, $SJIM, and long Jim Cramer, $LJIM, has been filed.

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

As it turns out the biggest merge of the day
Wasn't @ethereum but some tech M&A
@Adobe buys @figma for a cool $20 bil
But investors said nah, their stock took a spill
The wisdom of markets caused that much of a tank?
VCs couldn't care less, laughing all the way to the bank

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

When you can't run #WeWork like you used to before
And Masa's not on your term sheet
Will you still remember the feel of those funds
Will you let me have a board seat?
- @a16z covering Ed Sheeran, probably

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

WHO'S READY FOR HAIKU FRIDAYYYY

Biden/MBS
Murderer of the free press
But we need oil

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

Some were saying prices rises: done
But here we go again with a 9.1
Not much to say so I'll cut it short
Why the fuck is it "print" not report?

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

@elonmusk's bid for @twitter's fallen suddenly flat
He and the board in a big public spat
They're claiming fraud, he says there's bots
So now we need lawyers to connect the dots
But they'll come around to the goal
Of their platform's one biggest troll

[litquidity @litcapital]

Americans traveling in Europe this summer with the EUR/USD at parity

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

For the first time in years, it sits at zero
The difference between the dollar and Euro
Good for Americans going abroad
Bad for Germans seeing Cape Cod
What does it mean for markets like forex?
That they're getting more volatile than your ex.

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

It's Haiku Friday

Jobs report is good
More hires than expected
S&P still cries

#haikufriday #StockMarket

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

@exec_sum Working for Zuck might be a bit of a slog
You're basically running a glorified blog
And it's not the same as for Page or for Brin
But no doubt at all: A16Z will ask her to #LeanIn

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

Once again it's that time of year
Corporations are people, and now they're all queer!
@CocaCola is gay, and @Walmart's a twink
@Microsoft's tweeting out its secret kink
So I'll jump on in, although a bit faddy
For the month of June, I'm EBITDAddy

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

You would think in this day and age
The media was beyond angst, teenage
But for some reason in today's edition
The @nytimes decries female ambition
Emily Weiss and company @glossier
It's on both names they prey
Unicorn of makeup and lip gloss?
Pithily summarized: #girlboss

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

What's that? The markets end the week positive?
There has to be something there causative
Is it fundamentals, or a dead cat bounce?
A sign of the growth VCs now renounce?
Maybe a shake out, an emergence from dusk
As thinks the man himself... @elonmusk

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

@TheTeslaBull @BLKMDL3 @S3XYstarship @IWill_Travel @AOC Based on past experience, about 12 to 18 months. Companies that are inherently negative cash flow (ie value destroyers) need to die, so that they stop consuming resources.

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

The war in Ukraine
Has caused nothing but pain
Putin’s quest for more land
Hasn’t gone quite as he planned
Their economy’s growth only wanes
But the ruble has more and more gains
The connection has seemed gone awry
But the question still remains: why?

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

The fed is exploring raising rates even quicker
Oh god, my stocks, I can't watch the ticker
Now, combatting inflation is no easy feat
Especially with an already bloated balance sheet
But it's Powell's job, it comes down to his call
We'll just have to see if he's Volcker, Paul

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

A morning social limerick:

“Hey, do you want to give me your $Snap?”
“You’re really cute and your song choices slap”
But for all Gen Z’s lines
They couldn’t stop the declines
As the stock loses half of it’s market cap

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

Startups and VCs both caught in the haze
Seeing the broader public market malaise
Here through my poems I hope you’ll be lured
Back to a time where funding: secured

[InVerseYieldCurve @BullishBard]

The past couple weeks, the markets have tanked
Thousands losing paper profits they’d banked
Stocks have pulled back without discretion
What are we facing, if not recession?