Girl what you doing?
Me: getting my masters. Honing my niche career, a skincare regimen, perfecting makeup. Building enterprise level. travelling. Upgrading my car & wardrobe. getting fit. Starting to invest. being luminous. Taking care of me, and billing men!
Uber passenger: "Love your Tesla. But how often do you have to find a place to charge it?"
Me: "I never have to find any place, I don't use public chargers. I charge out of my garage wall, just like you do your iPhone at home."
Uber passenger: "Well how much does that increase your power bill?"
Me: "I don't know, how much does your iPhone increase your power bill?
Uber passenger: "Uhhhhhh, well, I don't know."
Me: "Yeah, me neither. It's that negligible and unimportant."
Uber passenger: "Ok, but what about battery fires? I know they catch fire all the time. How many batteries have you gone through?"
Me: "12"
I got bumped up to first on my last business trip, and was next to a CEO of a very large company I won’t name, who spent 45 minutes of the flight typing an appreciation email to one of his employee’s for his work anniversary, and that was just really cool to see.
Automate your processes. Invest in hotel CRMs. Because a hotel owner should not be asking a manager how many guests in rooms. Log into your systems & run it properly.
But the average 🇳🇬 business man loves doing “Ebubechukwu Ventures Enterprise” business level operations.
A few months ago, a man got in touch with me through a childhood friend. He wanted help disposing of his hotel because the business was no longer profitable. The overhead costs, including energy, maintenance, and staff salaries, had become overwhelming. In fact, he had started using money from another business just to keep the hotel running.
Because he wanted everything handled discreetly, we agreed to meet at the hotel. I would pose as one of his guests so the staff wouldn't suspect he was planning to sell. The idea was to prevent any possibility of staff looting the property.
Earlier that day, the hotel manager had sent him a report stating that only 5 of the hotel's 30 rooms were occupied.
When we arrived, the manager asked who I had come to see. I told him I had an appointment with the owner's P.A., whom he also knew. A few minutes later, the owner and his P.A. showed up. The manager immediately became nervous, as though he had seen a ghost.
Since he had claimed that only 5 rooms were occupied, I requested to inspect the remaining 25 rooms. As we moved around the property, we discovered activities in several of them. By the end of the inspection, we realized that 28 rooms were actually occupied.
That was when the owner realized the manager and some members of staff had been collecting money directly from guests and keeping it for themselves.
Running a business in Nigeria today is challenging. Even well-structured businesses are under immense pressure. The hotel industry is particularly challenging because of the high cost of diesel and irregular power supply. Solar systems can only do so much, while those with stable electricity often fall under Band A tariffs, which many hotels struggle to afford.
Then, while you're busy thinking of new strategies to keep the business afloat, you discover that some of your staff are making more money than you are, and sleeping peacefully at night while you also stay awake looking for the next big break.
Obi refused to influence party primaries for his candidates and people are having a meltdown.
You gutless cankerworms are so deeply taken by corruption. That’s the only thing you people understand.
The moment you ask a woman to have duty sex is the moment she’ll never ever be attracted to you again. You’re now on her list of chores and she hates you for it. Don’t do it.
Anyone else remember when Special K created their own diet and it was basically just eating two bowls of Special K every day and everyone accepted that as medically sound?
Her resume is stacked. What a woman—she's highly competent.
She has been:
Chief Marketing Officer at Netflix
Chief Brand Officer at Uber
Chief Marketing Officer at Endeavor
Worked with Apple Music and PepsiCo
Offers like this go dey normal for person wey get this kind resume na.
I will only marry a kind, calm, mature man who loves God, has a great mindset, has enjoyable hobbies of his own, loves to keep his house together, exercises, enjoys culinary experiences, relaxing and traveling, and is not poor. if he is 75, that’s fine lmfao
I was eyeing the CFO role of a very big real estate company in Abuja. Very big that only the commissions they pay to agents in a month is in billions.
One day, my principal had a dealing with them that warranted me to send an email to the said office.
I addressed it to the ‘CFO’.
He saw my draft and said ‘CFO ke, accountant jare’
I didn’t think much of it.
Another day, I accompanied my principal to an event hosted by the company.
We sat at the front then one young lady was sharing water. My principal said “Na the accountant be this”
Sharing water and small chops???😭😭
Before I could recover from the second-hand shame he added “They just increased her salary to N250K”
There’s no finance department. Just one accountant doing the work of 15 people🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️
Shame wear be Givenchy😭
I am sure all you girls on this street have outgrown this by now. People used to fight me over this on this street like 10 years ago. Anyway, let me just repeat the lesson for any absentees among you.
Don't send your noodles to any man here asking for it. Once he asks for it, dump him. He ain't the man for your future.
I once flew 30+ hours from Melbourne to London to pitch during the peak of the SoftBank Vision Fund era.
I had a 39°C fever.
The investor was 90 minutes late.
When he finally walked into the room, he was barefoot.
No shoes. No socks. Just completely barefoot.
I started pitching.
About 30 seconds later he opened a bag of peanuts.
Crunch.
Crunch.
Crunch.
Then he interrupted:
“How much are you raising?”
“$100-150M.”
“I’ll give you $300M. We can king-make your company.”
Meeting over.
20 minutes total.
I spent longer getting from Heathrow to the office than the actual pitch.
Fundraising is one of the strangest games in business.
You can spend months doing DD work with them and preparing for a meeting. And sometimes the person deciding the future of your company is barefoot and eating peanuts while you have a 39-degree fever.
The best hires are the ones you can delegate outcomes to, not tasks. Good hires come back with smart questions about the next step. Great ones just get the job done.
There is a way you will respect a babe’s aura and fineness from the mystery until you hear and see what they dated and the drama of chasing after whatever. You can’t unsee it😭
My buddy, nontechnical, went all in on AI from the start. He's now Chief AI Officer at his company, and has convinced them to buy him a Blackwell GPU ($15k) to run local agent workflows.
And here I am, a decade into a career in ML, begging my CTO for more training budget.
pls pls don’t build a marketing tool/agent and tell me it will do marketing for me. bec trust me, I will test it and I have.
and it doesn’t do marketing for me. not one tool I have tested from these crazy launches we’ve seen in the past months has ever done marketing for me.
I’m not saying these are not good tools. I’m just saying you are overpromising for likes and it doesn’t deliver.
be real on what your tool can do.
even if it’s a small thing, it can help.
explain it clearly and simply.
don’t promise the world for likes.