conk

bio

[conk @CXNKks]

@2Big2Broly @MMacrury98812

[conk @CXNKks]

Haven’t been on here for a while but thought I should let people know I just had a MASSIVE ice cream sundae. #explodingfromtheinsideout

[conk @CXNKks]

Playing my first Yakuza game wish me luck

[conk @CXNKks]

@S3S373N3N @2Big2Broly my eye is swelling up like a fucking balloon missed opportunity to be a pirate for Halloween. (P.s. @S3S373N3N your @ is like a fucking shite strong password)

[conk @CXNKks]

@sad5ky Moaning to hopefully freak the tiger out they don’t call me tiger woods for nothing.

[conk @CXNKks]

I saw a car the other day and it looked like sally from cars but instead of clarifying I just pointed at a car and said “woah that’s like the car from cars” I feel like a knobend

[conk @CXNKks]

@TwoFarmersHfd please make your crisps easier to open, near about knocked out my hamster the other days trying to open a pack of your lightly salted crisps.

[conk @CXNKks]

Some mf came into my work and asked for a Guinness and then asked what we had in cans when I offered him a Guinness 0 he got mad and said “no way that’s like watching porn on the radio”. Bro what 😭

[conk @CXNKks]

Been thinking about making a movie with a protagonist who has a peg leg. Might call him… Pete?

[conk @CXNKks]

Made a movie with a guy called Lary Kut in it who had cutlery as a hand. Now await my new idea Allan Wrench. It’s up to you to think of the twist this time 😉

[conk @CXNKks]

Anyone else see that one photo where it’s the AI shark brain rot on the side of a pub in an arsenal kit. Why would anyone CHOOSE to put that on their establishment???

[conk @CXNKks]

@2Big2Broly Broly Sanders?

[conk @CXNKks]

@2Big2Broly Gonna become a policeman and arrest you the second you get in the car

[conk @CXNKks]

@2Big2Broly Fi ye dem final challenge badman riddle me tis

[conk @CXNKks]

@S3S373N3N Evenings or misery and despair.

[conk @CXNKks]

All fits are unique as fuck, like it’s soo tricky to be wearing the same thing as other people. But if you’re a neddy little shit that wears Nike tech suits just a warning, you and your mates look like the tombliboos.

[conk @CXNKks]

Since I’ve been working at my local pub walking around is so much more fun, because people don’t like to admit they drink, so instead they just nod at you and keep walking. I feel like a mafioso.

[conk @CXNKks]

@2Big2Broly I been busy every Sunday praying to be top 5 dude

[conk @CXNKks]

@2Big2Broly The guy said mines sucked booty and gave me a 70 😭