Writer's writer

Human. Machine Learning Engineer. former Data Scientist. Internal Auditor. Banker. Fraud Analyst. Auditor. Accountant. Basically, I'm a jack of all trades...

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

Sometimes two accounts are linked to one card and both are active. Sometimes, they ask because only the customer knows which of the two active accounts is funded at that time. An account can be active but empty at the time of purchase, but maybe we can expect a time when the machine simply charges whatever account is funded

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

Stupid take. Almost as stupid as the post you replied to. You’re confusing individual profitability with institutional loyalty and brand equity. That’s exactly how daft people think.

A retail customer is not “valued” because the CEO personally cries when they leave. They’re valued because of scale, aggregation, and ecosystem stickiness. One account doesn’t move the needle, but millions of “insignificant” accounts are literally the balance sheet.

And the idea that they won't miss him is not even the point you think it is. Banks don’t operate on emotional absence. They operate on retention metrics, cost of acquisition, and churn. If you leave, they don’t mourn you. They adjust models. We all know that.

But pretending that means you can treat non HNI customers badly because they won’t matter individually is just shallow thinking. That’s how institutions slowly rot.

Also, I’m a banker so I know you’re lying about them being unbothered about customers leaving. Being inside the system doesn’t automatically upgrade your argument. It just means you should know better.

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@aldagutr He has a narrow minded view of banking

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@gimbakakanda This tweet did not age well

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

“Wishes” is not appropriate for this context. Fix up!!!

[MS Ingawa @MSIngawa]

Innalillahi Wa’inna Ilaihi Raji’un

Katsina State Government wishes to announce the tragic passing of Major General Rabe Abubakar (rtd) in bandits captivity.

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@Neel_2014 @Toribabieegirl What a dumbass

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@Yantumakii You are a munafiq.

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@Rxbremen @Yantumakii If you have proof that someone had a loss and the bank still behaved like an interest bank, spill it. Otherwise, enough with this Jibber jabber

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@JacksonW790116 @MrbenjaaminX

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@TayeAgent @MrbenjaaminX 😂😂😂

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@G46393681 @TobiTheRunner It can be taught and improved upon to some extent

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

I wish the FRSC conducted IQ and psychometric tests before issuing driver's licences, especially for okada riders in Abuja, because some of the decisions you see on the road make you question whether self-preservation is a universal instinct. I'm tired.

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@ejykmykel1 @mistujohnson Despite his Papa's mentorship you still remain foolish. Which means your foolish cannot be cured

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@obadiahnali @Jhornne01 You don go smoke ibo

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@CEO_LEVEL_NG This service is not as expensive as you think, and he isn't using it everywhere he goes.

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

ICAN has just reached an agreement with IIA. IIA Global admitted ICAN to CIA Challenge Exam Pathway.Under the new arrangement, eligible ICAN members will now have access to the CIA Challenge Exam, an accelerated pathway designed for qualified accounting professionals seeking to obtain the globally recognised CIA designation.
What this means:
Before you write 3 separate exams with more study time, multiple registrations and exam sittings..
Now
ICAN Challenge Route
1 exam only
150 multiple-choice questions
180 minutes
Same CIA designation after passing The Institute of Internal Auditors
Eligibility
You generally need:
Active ICAN membership
Good standing with ICAN
Required documentation during application

[ICAN Success With Akin Obilana @AObilana]

Have you heard?

ICAN pathway to CIA

What is the CIA?

CIA = Certified Internal Auditor

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@Naplaymaker Just shut up

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@amelia_tweetz Vucking idiot

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@AObilana When the time is right he'll make the move and if he never makes that move, then it wasn't meant to be.

[Writer's writer @ChekhovPynchon]

@siddiiqaan_1 They always shift the goal post