Nelson Nelson

Professional Cucker, Heisman Trophy Winner

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

Diners, Dinosaurs, and Drag Shows

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

Put a bomb in a secret area

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

A conversation y’all aren’t ready for: being super religious is a huge red flag

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

Considering simply killing myself

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

Faker than FAT FUCK’s coaching career

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

Yo @SpiritAirlines I need you to apologize rn for being racist and just overall an unacceptable and wrong and terrible airline. Nelson Nelson officially gives you the “go fuck yourself” stamp.

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

There was a mass shooting in Akron and the top 2 trends are Cardi and Jungkook. I hope they both die

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

Sweet snacks make me want something salty. Salty snacks make me want something sweet. But nothing tastes as good as the barrel of a gun in my mouth

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

Dreamt that I saw the face of god. Woke up looking in a mirror. Makes ya think

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

I have a secret… I have the nuclear launch codes

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

The Little Caesars Crazy Puffs are genuinely life changing (I have diarrhea)

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

@stanknfrank What have you done

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

Holy shit? Helen Keller is fake

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

@stanknfrank @nocoochie @MohanEssy @VonKooper Fuck you

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

My burner has been found. I am an exposed man. Time to expose myself at the local park

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

I have it on 100% confidence that I would absolutely destroy Taylor Swift in a fight

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

I used to be a little slut for hot chocolate

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

My legend continues to grow, one day I will be more than you can ever imagine

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

My life goal is to simply disappear one day. Start over

[Nelson Nelson @Chosen1Nelson]

Having vivid day dreams of blowing my head off my shoulders