Chris Putro

Philly guy. Standup comedian. World traveller. Skeptic. Libertarian. Atheist. Hyperintellectual. Misanthrope. Sage. Genetic wonder.

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

@LasVegasCounsel The first time Paul was on SNL in 1980, they showed the video for "Coming Up" in lieu of a live performance. Finally doing the song live last night after (one day short of) 46 years seemed like a nice callback. Some of us appreciate history.

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

@CBSLA Fat people no longer complaining about weather that is comfortable to us normal people.

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

@Melissa_Magee @NBCLA 90s and 100s is neither excessive nor dangerous.

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

Who did it better? #Halloween3 @SusannaHoffs

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

@NBCLA Kurt Angle won a gold medal with a broken freaking neck!

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

@NBCLA @ShootSeanNBCLA I’ve seen them at Lake Balboa, which feeds into the LA River.

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

@alexvnews @NBCLA @CHPInland “Motorist”? Singular? Which individual motorist should slow down while all other motorists continue at their normal speed?

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

I'm starting to think my entire life of not picking up on hints from girls was written by M. Night Shyamalan.

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

@ericarhodes Dating advice to women: Talk more, about yourself. Stop asking questions like it's a job interview. Interrupt and one-up. Guys really really hate when a girl won't participate equally in the conversation on a date.

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

@1womanonly The 10 women on this show all opted to be on the 8:00 or 9:45 lineup. What lesson am I supposed to learn? You hurt your credibility here.

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

@InoelleLynn Here's what our last couple messages look like now. Your profile isn't even accessible.

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

@InoelleLynn Looks like you just got banned from Facebook. "I'm impressed, and I don't impress easy."

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

@CaltransHQ For a couple hours I've been hearing cars running over something LOUDLY on the 101 near Campo de Cahuenga. What's the ETR?

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

@TwistedTeaser @Pukosworld Camelback?

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

#Prayers4NoMoreReligion

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

@_bamaboyz no, it's Monday the 28th.

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

@rickshapirotv @MaronIFC I believe it was moved to the 13th. Reruns on the 6th.

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

I'm always disappointed when I watch #WWE and there's a contract-signing and the cigarette doesn't powerbomb Amanda Green through a table.

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

My favorite ironic unit of currency is the Vietnamese dong.

[Chris Putro @ChrisPutro]

One time I told Stan Musial that I wanted to be a ballplayer when I grew up. One of my biggest regrets in life is lying to Stan Musial.