Erik Buehler

Educator/Varsity Assistant Arapahoe Boys Basketball ✝️ Instagram: @therealcoachbue

[Erik Buehler @coachbue]

Wife: “let’s put Christmas movies on while I make cookies.”

Me: “can I watch film while we watch Christmas movies and you bake?”

Wife: “yeah as long as a Christmas movie is on.”

Point of the story is marry well if you want to Coach!😂

[William Payne @TweetsbyCoachP]

One of the biggest misconceptions in high school sports is that coaching is primarily about practices, games, and wins.

The reality is that coaching has become one of the most challenging roles in education because coaches are expected to wear dozens of hats while being evaluated from every direction.

Every parent, player, administrator, and community member often has a different expectation of success.

One family wants college recruiting to be the priority.

Another wants playing time.

Another wants winning.

Another wants player development.

Another wants discipline.

Another simply wants their child to enjoy the experience.

The challenge is that those goals frequently conflict, and coaches are often expected to satisfy all of them simultaneously.

Most coaches are balancing far more than what happens between the lines. They manage team culture, player conflicts, parent concerns, academics, transportation, fundraising, budgets, equipment, scheduling, eligibility, social media issues, and the emotional needs of teenagers.

At the same time, every roster includes athletes with different abilities, goals, motivations, and commitment levels. Some dream of college athletics. Some are trying to make varsity. Some simply want to belong. Building one program that serves all of them is incredibly difficult.

Perhaps the greatest challenge is decision-making.

Who starts?

Who plays?

Who sits?

Who travels?

Who gets moved up?

Who gets cut?

Every decision creates opportunity for one athlete and disappointment for another. Even well-intentioned decisions can be viewed as favoritism or politics when seen through the lens of an individual family.

Recruiting adds another layer of complexity. Coaches are expected to help athletes pursue college opportunities while also managing the needs of an entire team. Supporting one athlete can sometimes raise questions from another family about their child’s opportunities.

Social media has amplified many of these challenges. One lineup decision, one difficult conversation, or one emotional moment can quickly become public discussion, often without the full context.

There are also pressures many people never see.

Pressure from administrators to represent the school well.

Pressure from parents to provide opportunities.

Pressure from athletes to help them achieve their goals.

Pressure from communities that often measure success by wins and losses.

Pressure to retain athletes in an era of increasing transfers and movement.

And all of this occurs while coaches are trying to develop young people, not just athletes.

What makes coaching difficult is not that people don’t care.

It’s that everyone cares deeply, but often about different things.

Parents focus on their child.

Players focus on their opportunities.

Administrators focus on the school.

Communities focus on results.

Coaches must somehow balance all of those interests while making decisions they believe are best for the team.

As a former college coach, athletic director, and high school administrator, I’ve learned that most coaches are not trying to hold athletes back, play favorites, or make life difficult for families. Most are simply navigating competing priorities, limited resources, and difficult decisions while trying to do what’s best for kids.

Because at its core, coaching has never really been about managing games.

It’s about managing people.

And that’s what makes it both incredibly challenging and incredibly important

[Erik Buehler @coachbue]

@steeder10 If I’m reading this correctly for youth players this actually would mean your best players play the vast majority and your bench plays hardly at all.

[Greg Berge @GregBerge]

Most parents think they’re helping their child.

Their coach sees it differently.

Here are 9 things coaches want parents to understand.

1. We care about your child.
Even when playing time is limited, nothing is personal. Every player has a role. Every role matters. Help us celebrate theirs.

2. The time commitment is real.
Only two people truly understand a coach’s schedule: the coach and their spouse. We are always on. We sacrifice family time to invest in your child. We don’t need a pat on the back. Just respect that fact.

3. We love this job.
But it is a hard job. Don’t steal our joy. Our passion. Our commitment. We are losing too many coaches.

4. We want to win more than you do.
We are competitive. We put our heart and soul into this. Strategy matters less than you think. We are at every practice. Trust what we see.

5. Everything is earned.
Don’t blame the coach. Encourage your child to do the work. The weight room. The driveway. The gym. You get what you earn.

6. Trust the process.
Team sports are the ultimate lab for life. There will be bumps. That is guaranteed. Accept it. The life lessons will last long after the final score.

7. Winning is hard.
Other teams want it too. Learning to win and lose is part of it.

8. Your child gets it.
They are at every practice. They know their role. Don’t feed their insecurities by questioning the coach. It hurts them and the team.

9. This is your child’s experience, not yours.
Let them enjoy it. Don’t judge. Don’t be critical. Just be there. Tell them you love watching them play. Be a fan of the team.

Share this with a parent who needs it.

Follow me for ideas on coaching, leadership, culture, and teams.

Subscribe to my free weekly newsletter, Great Teams Better Leaders.

Link in bio.

[Erik Buehler @coachbue]

@Bball_CO @JimHowery Tournament was always better at CU. Was even better when elite 8 was hosted in regional spots like Mines. If it becomes prestigious you sell out Coors Event Center for final 4.

[Erik Buehler @coachbue]

@dcoopbball Thanks Coach

[Erik Buehler @coachbue]

@coach_mel_redd I understand the importance of recovery during/after sets. It when working HS athletes I think Coaches know that many athletes see rest as socialization time and the rest time becomes indefinitely extended. Which leads to distraction then poor performance in the workout.

[Erik Buehler @coachbue]

@jsunkle @hoopheadspod

[Erik Buehler @coachbue]

@hoopheadspod I don’t understand the Eastern Conference. 🤷‍♂️🧐😂

[Erik Buehler @coachbue]

@hoopheadspod 😂

[Coach Jeff Barnes @JeffBarnes52]

As an AD, I remind our coaches that no one person is bigger than the program. The most talented player on the team can sometimes cause more harm than good if standards are compromised for them. Culture must always come before talent. When athletes believe different rules apply to certain people, trust in the program disappears. Everyone has value, but everyone is also replaceable. Strong programs are built on accountability, discipline, and team-first mentality, not on one individual.

[Erik Buehler @coachbue]

@newstart_2024 @JonHaidt

[Erik Buehler @coachbue]

@hoopheadspod @cavs Feel your pain, could be worse, you could be begging the Nuggets to make a shot or guard someone.🤦‍♂️🤷‍♂️

[COLLECTIVE FOOTBALL @QBCollective]

Kyle Shanahan, San Francisco 49ers Head Coach, on the difference between a coach who wants to be liked and one who actually makes you better.

-Every recruit has people telling them they're great right now. That's not coaching
-The best coaches aren't the ones you like most. They're the ones who make you uncomfortable enough to grow

[Erik Buehler @coachbue]

Sums the current state of basketball very well!

[Brian McCormick @brianmccormick]

This may be the best (most important 🤷‍♂️) paragraph I have written in 25 years.

[Erik Buehler @coachbue]

@JamieJamie_O @GrizzliesFilm Refer the video Adam shared in this thread. It’s a rebounding/defensive system used to create more offensive rebounding opportunities and matching up to limit the other teams transition while you’re aggressive on the glass.

[Erik Buehler @coachbue]

@GrizzliesFilm That was where my mind went right away, was Aaron Fearne’s tag up rebounding. I haven’t seen the Grizzlies much this year so I haven’t seen Iisalo’s tactics.

[Erik Buehler @coachbue]

@JUCOadvocate @PUMAHoops @PRO16League This is the best name of any basketball event I’ve ever seen!

[hoopheadspod @hoopheadspod]

Our Latest NBA @hoopheadspod with @CoachBue

🏀The Jokic MVP Case & Denver's Playoff Outlook
🏀Potential West Playoff Matchups
🏀Can James Harden Lift the Cavs in the Playoffs??
🏀Potential East Playoff Matchups

@HdStartHoops @jsunkle @Wealth4Coaches @coachportfolio @D3Direct @GiveWithHoops
https://t.co/wKn9lVQZVs