Corporatebish

Just out here trying to survive the corporate life Insta: @ corporatebish

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

Working Monday, but then off on Tuesday for the holiday?

Pretty ghetto if you ask me...

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but before you hit that “reply all” button, ask yourself whether it is absolutely necessary to bother everyone with your nonsense

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

My toxic trait is that I deliberately do not send out a “very important” work email to see if anyone will notice

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

Forget “Summer Fridays” that isn’t enough. I’m going to need the whole summer off like I’m back in grade school.

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

Sometimes happiness looks like a canceled Friday afternoon meeting

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

Oh you want to talk to my manager?

No problem, let me take this off my plate and put it onto their plate

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

Boss: Why don’t you feel comfortable being honest with us?

Me: Because I don’t want to be fired

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

Happy bare minimum Friday!

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

People who call their co-workers without warning, please explain yourself

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

Co-worker: Can we Zoom real quick?

Me: No we cannot, leave me alone

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

I just want to know how TF it’s Monday, again

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

I don’t know about anyone else, but I’ve implemented my own “Summer Fridays” and they are effective immediately

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

My brother just sent me an email that said, “Please fix, per our prior conversation” and I just want to know who he thinks he is, but more importantly am I on his payroll.

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

Boss: I appreciate all your hard work, you’re a rockstar!

Me: Hahahagivemearaisethenhahaha

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

Going to add “professional meeting attendee” to my resume

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

It’s Sunday afternoon so I guess it’s time to either start panicking about Monday, or thinking of an excuse to get out of work

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

Sorry I didn’t have time to finish the assignment, but I did have time to apply to other random jobs

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

Friday is my unofficial day off, but if my boss is asking, I’m working all day

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

If management could kindly calm TF down, that would be great.

[Corporatebish @Corporatebishh]

Alexa, cancel my boss’s return flight home from vacation