Oli North

No philosopher, no savant, an incompetent zoologist, he drinks too much and cannot punctuate. Someone ought to put a stop to him.

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

"Now the police have gone can we dance?"

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

And the other reason that he’s the greatest of course, is that he’s not a twat.

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

What do you say? We’re not here to judge...

[Alanna @SouthLondonGirl]

Hello friends! I’ve just been told that wanky people say “mortar & pestle”. Is this true?? I’ve literally never heard anyone put the mortar first.

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

Weird shit I google no. 1,476... Australia vs The Moon

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

Godammit! I forgot my toothbrush.

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

@theboydonefood They're feckin' awesome!

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

@SouthLondonGirl Nonsense La.

Frankly I'm amazed that sausages are still a thing at all. Meat rationing stopped the best part of 70 years ago.

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

The Economist ‘style’ often verges on parodic. In articles like this it’s just fucking stupid.

[The Economist @TheEconomist]

Would-be asylum-seekers take to the sea partly because legal routes are largely closed. Britain currently has no humanitarian-visa scheme for them https://t.co/oIW8hbvjCX

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

@SouthLondonGirl I will see you next week. I’m only back for a few days then going to Belfast on the w/e, but sometime first 1/2? X.

[Southwark Council @lb_southwark]

Help us to end rough sleeping in Southwark and keep everyone warm and safe this winter. If you do see someone sleeping rough and want to help, please contact https://t.co/n3Aiq4bU1l

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

@JancisRobinson (I don’t know about the wines in question. But it’s certainly the case for some.)

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

@JancisRobinson A particularly galling aspect of this (which I’m sure you know already!) is that many of these super-heavyweight bottles are made in France, and not in China or local markets. So a European consumer is drinking from a bottle that’s been shipped halfway around the world, twice.

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

@jayrayner1 On toast *with Marmite*.

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

To say there’s ‘blood on the hands’ of the current UK government is a colossal understatement. They’re fucking drenched in it.

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

It may come as a surprise to some in the UK, but ‘right of centre’ politicians in other parts of the world are not by definition callous and buffoonish.

Here’s something @marshall_steven , the Premier of South Australia, said a few months back which made me sit up.

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

That’s the same *Liberal Party* Premier of SA who has overseen a Covid policy which has acted quickly, seriously, and followed scientific advice throughout. Resulting in a total of four deaths, the last over a year and a half ago.

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

One of the most serious and ferociously bright PMs the UK’s ever had. And we got rid of him for whatever-the-fuck-you-want-to-call-the-last-12-years, because I hesitate to use the word ‘government’.

[Kay Burley @KayBurley]

🌍 Jabs for all 💉

The government say they’re on target for vaccine donations…

But that’s not “strictly correct”, says former PM @GordonBrown.

#KayBurley BH

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

Unforeseen coming together of despairing Carolina Panthers twitter accounts + @Coldwar_Steve

[Cat Crave @CatCraveBlog]

Matt Rhule getting home and finding out someone else has gotten the USC job.

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

[You can possibly see where this is going]

It was of course, after many years, one of these pictures of a toilet, presented with no text other than the subject line 'You're Welcome', which finally proved too much for the other Chloe North.

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

I was reminded recently of something amusing that happened to me a while back...

For many years I had exchanged emails with my sister Chloe. We talked about smoked fish, shared psychedelic videos about Weasels, and other sorts of normal inter-sibling correspondence...

[Oli North @CoteDuPy]

One of our ongoing debates tackled the question of whether on dual-flush toilets the little button was for little flush, or big flush, or some kind of combination was involved.

Which obviously involved sending each other various pictures of toilets as we compiled evidence...