Lindsey Whiddon

get on my cloud, baby.

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

I just uploaded “Fundly_Masthead WEB.mp4” to #Vimeo: https://t.co/zN6CwuC6Kd

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

I just uploaded “IMG_6395 https://t.co/kjKraJCV7s” to #Vimeo: https://t.co/O9Ze1X5l7z

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

Them: “Wanna go see a movie? It starts at 9:10”
Me: “Oh I could never, that’s way too late”
•
Me at 3am: “I need to learn Attic Greek immediately.”

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

My mom keeps using the Mexican flag on her posts from Italy and it’s giving me life. #loveislove 🇲🇽 🇮🇹

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

@alyssalimp At least he’s polite. I hope you said yes and were grateful about it

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

I feel like being an adult is really just going to the bathroom to find out if it’s a shart instead of rolling the dice in your pants.

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

My life is sending an email that says “see attachment” and then a follow up email that says “oops, forgot to attach”.

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

I feel like everyone in FL is just confused all the time

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

Why when, as a fully developed self-actualized adult female, I try to (carefully) pick up broken glass off the floor, do people react like I’m drunk and playing with a loaded gun?

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

there's a guy in the kitchen eating a banana and i want to respect his privacy but also feel like I have to watch

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

“Backdoor guests are best.” -mom

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

Me: I feel like 3 mos is the perfect amount of time to get over a serious fling.

Her: ya, same. Well he’s going to jail for 4 months so that’s actually perfect.

Me: [blink blink]

[Conan O'Brien @ConanOBrien]

When I really need a good laugh, I just imagine Edward Scissorhands attempting to eat crab legs.

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

@PhilipBloom I feel like you should know that "Rule Britannia" is on my running mix. It really makes me believe britannia rules the waves.

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

Merry Christmas, bitchez

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

Can't remember when I started drinking "to take the edge off" at holiday gatherings. But boy am I sure glad I did.

#liquidmoodelevator.

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

"I saw mommy kissing Santa claus..."

Kids, your mother's a slut.

#christmassongswecandowithout

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

@notfiredyet it's the Jews. Always trying to undermine the birth of Christ with expensive jewels.

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

@joesimon @justinphamilton how bout now?

[Lindsey Whiddon @CountVonWhiddon]

I wonder how many idiots will get engaged today.