Joe Pesci

My name is Joe Pesci the actor bada bing you fucking idiot

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

I hate the idea heat level is so important for #hotsauce unless it’s like no heat at all 12 #scovilleunits baby shit that makes 52 year old white women go “oo too spicy” but taste like it was just made in the same room a chili pepper once was @hotonesgameshow #hotones

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

I would like to congratulate Gallagher 2, who today has finally upgraded to Gallagher 1

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

Daniel Jones’ topps card should be a picture of him shoving his shoulder pad back into his jersey after a sack #nfl #giants #nygiants

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

I feel like we’re going to see some worse than Jan 6th shit if Trump is hauled off in cuffs. Like a Dumbass 9/11. Driving two short buses into an Arbys.

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

BREAKING: #FBI Raids Trumps Safe and Confiscates All of His Bakugan

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

Fool. The real Mona Lisa is the #NFT of it in my #GameStop Wallet.

This physical copy is all but worthless.

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

As I clicked "purchase" on a $53 order for a Pee Wee Herman action figure and a Tony Soprano Tony Hawk parody t-shirt I realized in one succinct moment why my previous jobs felt like I didn't deserve to have more money.

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

#HappyEaster enjoy this #meme I made

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

I can't wait to slap the fuck out of David Allan Grier next year at the Webby's in defense of Larry David. #alopeciaawareness #Oscar

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

Hey did you hear a few billionaires had a tiff at their golden statue ceremony they hold every year while the rest of us struggle to afford food and shelter.

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

if you slap someone full force and not only do they not go down but they go right back to casually talking about documentaries, you have lost. #WillAndChris

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

Me: Sees a dollar bill on the ground
Me: looks like it’s my lucky day
John Quiñones: not so fast you piece of shit.

[Joe Pesci @Daily_Pesci]

Bada bing bada boom #Oscars

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

if you slap someone full force and not only do they not go down but they go right back to casually talking about documentaries, you have lost. #WillAndChris

[Joe Pesci @Daily_Pesci]

@samlibutti @LastWeekTonight @RealCarrotTop @jaleelwhite @WWYDABC don’t go the balls to respond.

[Joe Pesci @Daily_Pesci]

Damn bro I just shit my pants, I guess that’s why they call it GABAGOOL

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

“lol these idiots don’t just TRUST SCIENCE” I said, and then turned on a podcast about #cryptids because I know in my heart there is a half man half pig.

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

Today I told someone "I've been getting really into hot cocoa lately" and with every word of that sentence I felt the full weight of my entire body entering my 30's

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

Can’t wait for the #superbowl commercial where AC Slater teaches Screech’s corpse how to buy dogecoin

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

Google: So sometimes photographs of people of color in low light conditions don’t come out great so we tried to fix that in this camera.

Boomers: Did y’all see that commercial about the camera that exterminates all white people and turns my son into a communist? #SuperBowlLVI

[Sam LiButti @samlibutti]

If you thought “hey what if words in squares” and someone said “wow cool here have a million dollars” none of you would say no. #wordle