Daniel Hooton

The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

In a coffee shop -

Me: “excuse me, I have to go to the restroom. Would you mind keeping an eye on my stuff?”

Old man: “if anyone even looks at your stuff, I’ll kill them”

Me: “ok”

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

Hey @BradPaisley last year at the Blue Door Coffee Company, you asked me if I had a question to ask her after playing “Waiting On A Woman.” Well, I finally asked and we’re getting married October 15th at High Point Estate in Liberty Hill. Feel free to stop by!

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

Apple needs to stop autocorrecting the word “queso” to “quest”

I am never saying “quest”, I am always saying “queso”

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

@tonykemp I would love to have a conversation, my dude.

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

The world is burning. Be careful not to stand with a bucket of water in your hand, screaming how you weren’t the one who lit the match.

The time for tangible action is always the present.

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

Yesterday, I was sitting at a stop light and was so intrigued by someone’s dog that I didn’t see the light had turned green and missed being T-boned by someone who ran the red light.

Dogs save lives.

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

@HarrisonJReagan This is not a very good haiku.

[Whoa Interesting @WhoaInteresting]

I took my 360 camera and some steel wool out to my front yard and this was the result

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

@bespokepost Late: but anything from Shrek the Musical

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

@codyslamans @emmalbing @HarrisonJReagan Alternative take: life is too short to live.

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

@EMWright17

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

Remembering the time that I tried to do something nice for my mom:
Went to her garden, and pulled weeds. Only to find out that I had just pulled up all of her bluebonnets just before they were going to bloom.

She had been waiting for them for about a year.

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

Textbook: “patients with a carotid artery dissection may also present with neck pain”

Me who has been bent over a book at 90deg studying for 6 hours: “oh, no, I’m going to die”

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

@JaredWSaltz @whammontree I would like to be considered for the position.

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

@AaronChewning That’s a hard sell - but I think I can get the bride on board.

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

Hey @AaronChewning can I use this song in my wedding

[Aaron Chewning @AaronChewning]

all these things that I’ve cranked!!!? this took me an hour and a half sorry throw me in jail

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

Looking back fondly at the day I met @tonykemp in the Nashville Airport and wishing I had something to sign because he was DFA’d by my team about 2 weeks later. We miss you here, bud.

[@levelsio @levelsio]

I'd rather spend $3000 on someone who can use it than wasting it on Twitter ads, so here we go

🎉New Year's Giveaway🍾

I'm giving away a new 🍏MacBook Pro 16" to a random person who retweets this tweet

👩‍🎨 Make something cool w/ it

(you have to follow because I want followers)

[Daniel Hooton @DanielJHooton]

@guessimcanadian I don’t know what you’re talking about