David

[BumTree @Bum_Tree_]

FOR SALE Retro fit parking sensor. Fits any make or model. £20 can deliver if local.

[Zenalytica @zenalytica]

My wife asked me to go out and buy her something that would make her look nice.

I came back with 4 bottles of whisky and a 1lt of vodka.

[Funny Signs & Clips @Funny_Signs_]

Tag a mate who would eat here...

[Bargain Hunters and Discount Codes @bargainhdc]

😂😂😂

[Funny Stuff 💙 💛 ‏ @BadTasteTee]

https://t.co/PaXMXYDADe

[David @DaveFern379]

Doctor : You need to stop masturbating.
Patient : Why ?
Doctor : I'm trying to examine you.

[Shit Jokes @ShitJokes]

I'm in a band called Dyslexia.

We've just released our greatest shit album.

[Funny Signs & Clips @Funny_Signs_]

Fact..

[Zenalytica @zenalytica]

This may well open a can of worms........😂

[Funny Stuff 💙 💛 ‏ @BadTasteTee]

https://t.co/Ddq7NeWaCc

[Jokes UK 🔞 @jokesuk]

The fire brigade had to free me from a condom machine last night. I misunderstood the instructions - 'Insert £2 and push knob in'

[Paul @GannetPaul]

@MathsDebation I met a transvestite from Greater Manchester today .......he had a Wigan address..

[Shit Jokes @ShitJokes]

I've asked my girlfriend to polish my medieval battle uniform while I go to the pub.

She always said she wanted a night in, shining armour!

[Zenalytica @zenalytica]

Best joke I've ever heard 😂 https://t.co/QYBoVpteVC

[Funny Stuff 💙 💛 ‏ @BadTasteTee]

https://t.co/Ddq7NeWaCc

[Dad Jokes @Crapjokesdad]

I like to wear my glasses when I’m having sex.

That way my eyes are protected from the pepper spray.

[Funny Stuff 💙 💛 ‏ @BadTasteTee]

https://t.co/Ddq7NfdLtK

[Zenalytica @zenalytica]

'Mum, I'm off out'. 'Not dressed like that you're not - change that mini skirt !' 'Why?' 'Coz your balls are dangling, Dave!' #MathsDebation

[Roscoe @motoroscoe]

@MathsDebation reminds me of the dyslexic pimp who bought a warehouse!!