David Burn

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

@LeeAndersonMP_ “Cold rage” appears to mean “throwing dustbins at police officers”. Take care not to hit a fellow rager by mistake, for this is a sign that your cold rage is insufficiently pure.

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

@MissAlly_01 They go to places no man has gone before. From this it follows that every human they meet is actually female, despite appearances. One wonders which toilets they use.

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

@paulafr68963440 By using my brain to contemplate the alternatives.

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

TECHNICALITY, n. In an English court a man named Home was tried for slander in having accused his neighbor of murder. His exact words were: "Sir Thomas Holt hath taken a cleaver and stricken his cook upon the head, so that one side of the head fell upon one shoulder and the other side upon the other shoulder." The defendant was acquitted by instruction of the court, the learned judges holding that the words did not charge murder, for they did not affirm the death of the cook, that being only an inference.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

@TheAliceSmith The statement is not “only low IQ people talk about low IQ people”. It does not preclude high IQ people talking about low IQ people. You are talking nonsense, which does not preclude you from being a high IQ person but does constitute evidence against the hypothesis.

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

@KathleenWinche3 You cannot logically answer "yes" to the question "are you a covert white supremacist?" If you do, you are no longer covert.

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

@AttorneyF_ @TheAliceSmith Do they swear by Jesus Christ in China? Or is China not part of human civilisation?

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

@BenedictSpence I don’t know a single person who voted for Brexit who thinks.

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

@alfarojoshua3 Higgledy piggledy
Wily Odysseus -
Versatile traveller,
Sacker of Troy -
After two decades of
Polytaraxia
Came home again to his
Wife and his boy.

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

@Fan0fCrawley Perhaps he played too many effortless shots when what was actually required was some effort.

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

Suppose that, in response to the masterly grasp of the situation you have just exhibited, humanity appoints you its guardian. The right button to press is whatever you say it is, and no one will press any button until you have made your decision.

Suppose also that you share the aspiration of many people: that no one should die as a result of your decision. After all, humanity would be foolish to appoint as its guardian someone who didn't care that billions died as long as he survived.

Now, if in fact everyone will do what you say is right, then it makes no difference which you decree is the correct button - everyone survives if all press red, everyone survives if all press blue. You might as well flip a coin.

Before you do, reflect on this: whichever button you designate as correct, some people will press the other one. Perhaps out of stubbornness - "nobody tells me what to do, I'll make up my own mind.” Perhaps out of incompetence or incapacity - "now, which one did he say again?"

You, the savior of humankind, want to save all of it including the obstinate and the deranged. If you say that red is right, some will die. If you say that blue is right, all will live.

Take it away, Genghis.

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

Suppose that, in response to the masterly grasp of the situation you have just exhibited, humanity appoints you its guardian. The right button to press is whatever you say it is, and no one will press any button until you have made your decision.

Suppose also that you share the aspiration of many people: that no one should die as a result of
your decision. After all, humanity would be foolish to appoint as its guardian someone who didn't care that billions died as long as he survived.

Now, if in fact everyone will do what you say is right, then it makes no difference which you decree is the correct button - everyone survives if all press red, everyone survives if all press blue. You might as well flip a coin.

Before you do, reflect on this: whichever button you designate as correct, some people will press the other one. Perhaps out of stubbornness - "nobody tells me what to do, I'll make up my own mind". Perhaps out of incompetence or incapacity - "now, which one did he say again?"

You, the savior of humankind, want to save all of it including the obstinate and the deranged.If you say that red is right, some will die. If you say that blue is right, all will live.

Take it away, Genghis

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

Suppose that, in response to the masterly grasp of the situation you have just exhibited, humanity appoints you its guardian. The right button to press is whatever you say it is, and no one will press any button until you have made your decision.

Suppose also that you share the aspiration of many people: that no one should die as a result of your decision. After all, humanity would be foolish to appoint as its guardian someone who didn't care that billions died as long as he survived.

Now, if in fact everyone will do what you say is right, then it makes no difference which you decree is the correct button - everyone survives if all press red, everyone survives if all press blue. You might as well flip a coin.

Before you do, reflect on this: whichever button you designate as correct, some people will press the other one. Perhaps out of stubbornness - "nobody tells me what to do, I'll make up my own mind". Perhaps out of incompetence or incapacity - "now, which one did he say again?" You, the savior of humankind, want to save all of it including the obstinate and the deranged.

If you say that red is right, some will die. If you say that blue is right, all will live.

Take it away, Genghis.

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

Suppose that you are chosen to be the final arbiter for this question. The right answer is whatever you say it is. Nobody presses any button until you make your decision, after which everyone must make their best effort to press the right button as determined by you.

Now, it makes very little difference whether you actually decree that the right answer is red or blue. But that little difference is this:

Despite their best effort, a few people will press the wrong button (as determined by you) - some perhaps from sheer perversity, others from incapacity or incompetence. If you determine that red is the right button, those people will die. If you determine that blue is the right button, those people will live.

Over to you.

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

@FondOfBeetles As to classical game theory, “all red votes” is obviously a Nash equilibrium. What about “all blue votes”?

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

@johnpalmer If all humans are rational everyone picks the same colour. There is no reason that colour should be red.

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

@MilanoTruffles It is no argument at all to say that if everyone chooses red everyone lives. If everyone chooses blue everyone also lives.

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

@Liv_Boeree @MrBeast A variant: if everyone presses blue, everyone collects $200. If anyone presses red, all red pressers collect $100 and blue pressers collect nothing. What do you do?

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

Algorithm for red-blue button scenarios:

Ask yourself which button Donald Trump would press.

Then press the other one.

[David Burn @DavidBurn4]

@kevinhollinrake @northyorksc Is cooked payroll actually on the menu?