XarMeechleous Zelvatross

Excelsior

[Clue Heywood @ClueHeywood]

Say what you will about the experiment that was LIV Golf, but at least most of the guys involved were really unlikable.

[XarMeechleous Zelvatross @DeeboJohnson13]

@TapItIn3 Making par is so sick

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

I mentioned that my garage door was making a sound.

An American immediately said, "I got a guy."

He did not ask what the sound was. He did not ask what kind of door. He produced a guy on the basis of the word garage.

I asked who the guy was.

He said, "Just a guy."

He did not have a company name. He had a first name and a phone number in his phone saved as "Mike Garage."

That is the contact name. Mike Garage. As though Garage is his surname. As though there is a family.

I asked how he found this guy.

"My brother-in-law used him."

I asked if the brother-in-law was satisfied.

He thought about it. Then he said, "He's still standing."

The house is still standing. That is the entire review.

Inside I said: THEY DO NOT KEEP RECORDS. THEY KEEP LOYALTIES.

I called Mike Garage. He answered from inside a vehicle. There was wind. He said he could come Tuesday between eleven and four.

Between eleven and four. A window of five hours. In my country this would be a scandal. Here it is generous. He gave me a window at all. Some guys do not give you a window. Some guys say "Tuesday" and that is the whole appointment.

He came at 1:40.

He fixed it in twenty minutes. He charged me less than I expected and he did not take a card, only cash or an app I had never heard of.

Before leaving he looked at my water heater, which I had not mentioned, and said, "That's gonna go."

I asked when.

"Couple years."

I asked what I should do.

He said, "I'll give you a guy."

He gave me a guy. Mike Garage has a guy. The guy has a guy. There is a network beneath this country made entirely of men named after their function, and none of them advertise, and all of them are busy.

Inside I said: THERE IS A SECOND NATION HERE. IT HAS NO SIGNS. IT IS ENTERED ONLY BY INTRODUCTION.

I have been given four guys since.

I have a guy for trees.

I did not know I needed a guy for trees.

I have trees now, apparently. They are my responsibility. A man named Rick told me so and then left.

[The Big Ern @bigernels]

Everyone begs to play golf then you ask if they can make a 10am tee time on a weekday and they cannot. Lame

[Cʅҽɱҽɳƚιɳҽ💜 @_theeunicorn_]

The era of Emeril Lagasse >>>>>>

[XarMeechleous Zelvatross @DeeboJohnson13]

@RandA

[Benjamin Smith @BSmith]

Bryson at #TheOpen

[Jamie Kennedy @jamierkennedy]

The difference in colour at Birkdale.

[Jason @LeZevo]

“Well, it’s got a full tank of gas”

[XarMeechleous Zelvatross @DeeboJohnson13]

@DivotDiplomat Has +8 thru 13 written all over it #shrink

[dank @cptdankkk]

Steph Curry says 105 is the most threes he's ever made in a row

“I do a game after practice where you shoot five spots around the arc. You start in the corner. The first two are free. If you make them, great. If you miss them, it doesn't matter”

“But after the third one, you shoot until you miss in that spot. I try to get to 50 around all five spots. But this particular day, I got to 105 in the first spot. I think I ended up with 140 something in the drill”

“So I guess every day, in some way, I have an opportunity to chase it, but I haven't gotten close since. Maybe 60 since then”

“I'm thinking 50. That's my goal. If I don't get to 50 over five spots, then I got to start over and do it again. At 40, I'm like, ‘I just got to stay locked in’”

“I want to say it was like 10 minutes or so. It's like therapy. It's like meditation. But I got mad at 105. When you miss, your expectations change a little bit”

[XarMeechleous Zelvatross @DeeboJohnson13]

@afshineemrani Non-Nano Zinc Oxide tallow sunscreen in stock here

https://t.co/CcwhrBuLb2

[XarMeechleous Zelvatross @DeeboJohnson13]

@sweatystartup https://t.co/CcwhrBuLb2

This is all you need. 5 total ingredients.

[RORY FANS @rory_fans]

Outrageous 🤩🤩

[New York Golfer @NewYorkGolfer13]

Signage at Boscobel Golf Club, Pendleton, South Carolina recognizing the current tournament champions and course record. EVERY golf course should be doing this. Display it proudly! @TheBel_Boscobel

[Coby DuBose | DuBose Defense @DuBoseDefense]

Here’s the deal: LIV began because a Sovereign viewed it as a non financial investment in public diplomacy, with dual benefits of elevating Saudi’s profile and sowing division in America while weakening an American cultural staple. Because the goals were never financial, the investment that allowed LIV to grow (overpaying players by about 10x) could happen. This briefly forced the PGA Tour to respond because enough fools accepted the indecent proposal because they didn’t quite understand that the 500 millionth dollar is less satisfying than the 1st one.

The public diplomacy project by Saudi, which is like a war in that it was never about a financial return, is now over. So LIV will collapse. But before it does, its worst actors will try to deceive investors using actual fraud to keep the scam going a little longer. This will probably not be successful in the short term and certainly won’t be successful in the long term.

Golf is a niche product and Jason Kokrak is not worth 50 million dollars. And that’s ok. Golf will heal. And the people who were weaponized into little political golf soldiers to support this vision will find a new grift and a new political tool to pour their malleable identities into.

The End.

[XarMeechleous Zelvatross @DeeboJohnson13]

@GOLF_com Seeing the flame touch the burger makes my marbles tingle. So tired of the flat top “smashburger” epidemic. They’re fine but nothing beats that fire

[Mike Beauvais @MikeBeauvais]

I dread the conversation so many of us are going to hafta have tonight.

How do I explain to my son, a lifelong fan of Smash GC, that he's no longer going to be able to watch Talor Gooch tee off in front of tens of fans twice a month?

He's going to be devastated.

[No Laying Up @NoLayingUp]

If LIV doesn’t come out with another one of these today I really don’t know what we’re doing here

[XarMeechleous Zelvatross @DeeboJohnson13]

@JonnyRoot_