Delaney Grass

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

*Dad and I driving*
Dad: “Hahah someone painted a 1 infront of that 30 on that speed limit sign to make it 130 mph”
Me: “Dad... that was me. I did that when I was in high school.” 😂😂

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

How do I get the job of driving the google maps car around the world? 😍

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

It’s 4:20, make a wish.

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

@IsabelleCadet_ Glad your finally awake

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

Me after every weekend: “I really need to stop drinking so much, my body can’t handle it anymore.”

Also me every Friday night:

[Dana Beers @danabeers]

Drunkest girl at the party last night ✅

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

@mjschwartzzz It was a rough night all around 😂

[Dana Beers @danabeers]

Day drinking is 10000 zillion times better than night drinking. I’m considering becoming strictly a day drinker. Although I do like to reward myself on Friday nights. And there’s nothing better than a good Saturday night rally after a Saturday day drink nap. So never mind

[Party Life @LifeAsParty]

hs teacher: i can't always spoonfeed you with notes because it's NOT like that in college college professor: i’ll email you the powerpoint

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

@lizzy_gillen @jaylee_farley I only go to McDonald’s for the playground

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

*Me asking my brother for his Amazon prime account info for the 37th*

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

@blake_brad33 🙋🏻‍♀️

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

@lizzy_gillen @mollierose11 Oh definitely. Waves were gnarly in the grass pool.

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

@rgras93 @IsabelleCadet_ Retweet 🙌🏼

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

I remember when all it took to make my day was the fact that my mom bought the foaming hand soap

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

Old habits die hard

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

@IsabelleCadet_ I can literally hear her saying “huh?” rn 😂

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

@lizzy_gillen Yes I honestly thought this tweet was funny but people say its sad.... like wtf?

[Delaney Grass @DelaneyGrass]

If I ever get in a bad accident and get put into a coma I hope I have one of those dreams where an angel tells you what to do with your life cause I really have no idea what I’m doing