Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant

Ex-Accountant, current bus conductor

[Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant @DinoAccountant]

Hi @elonmusk I’ve seen that you’ve been busy. Let me throw my hat in the ring as your personal UK accountant.

My focus will be on keeping my fees low with a quality of service to match.

[Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant @DinoAccountant]

I look forward to calculating your fare, rejecting card/note payments and making passive aggressive noises of irritation at every interaction on the 25 bus route.

Otherwise, it’s goodbye from me.

The Dinosaur Accountant

[Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant @DinoAccountant]

It’s with the deepest regret that I’m having to announce my retirement from the world of accounting!

A thread 🧵⬇️

[Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant @DinoAccountant]

It’s for that reason that I decided to reconnect with my first loves, numbers… and a hatred of people.

It’s for that reason that I’m delighted to announce that I’ve accepted a role as a bus conductor.

[Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant @DinoAccountant]

@mike_winnet @rianlanigan I’ve just discovered podcasts. I like them but I’m not sure they’ll last if no one is getting paid by listeners

[Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant @DinoAccountant]

What a start to 2022! I’ve had dozens of clients asking to me help them set out their goals for the next 12 months.

I’ve reminded them that I’m an accountant not a life coach and they should stop bothering me with that kind of nonsense.

[Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant @DinoAccountant]

@matthewgaffney @GuinnessGB @IrishRugby @flatironsquare_ Hey @matthewgaffney why don’t you shove this posed stock imagery up your ass!

#GUİNNESS #NFT #VAR #Matthewgaffney

[Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant @DinoAccountant]

Love it @InsightfulBob. But no need to do tax return work on 25th Dec. You’ve still got loads of time

[Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant @DinoAccountant]

@RyanNPearcy @DTiAccrualWorld Sage? Too modern for me. What is the obsession with computerised accounting systems?

Paper will do me fine thanks

[Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant @DinoAccountant]

@StuHurstCloud would you mind sending me details for your 10 biggest clients?

[Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant @DinoAccountant]

Shots fired @StuHurstCloud. Consider this my warning that I’m coming for all your clients

[Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant @DinoAccountant]

I saw a webinar advertised for accountants entitled “how to account for #cryptocurrency”.

Simple. Write it off through the P&L. The money is gone. There’s as much value in that stuff as there is in charitable donations.

[Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant @DinoAccountant]

@JStaatsCPA Would love to see a live one of those. You can acCount me in

[Formerly the Dinosaur Accountant @DinoAccountant]

@richardsergeant I’ve seen lots of accounting webinars about how compliance is dead. Is this what they mean?