Dolan J. Trunk

Not Donald Trump.

[Dolan J. Trunk @DolanTrunk]

Just had the most tremendous breakfast. People have said they’ve never seen anything like it. Greatness in every bite. We are bringing back breakfast, BIGLY!

[Dolan J. Trunk @DolanTrunk]

@Angelo_16_ Absolutely not. And I most definitely never have ran for office. But if I did I can tell you it would be the most tremendous campaign like nobody has ever seen before. I would win and I would win stronglier and biglier than anyone probably ever. That I can tell you.

[Dolan J. Trunk @DolanTrunk]

Frankly, millions and possibly trillions of people have said the @twitter wants to ban my account. I will build a tremendous wall around my Twitter account and Jack Dorsey and his twits will pay for it! That I can tell you.

[Dolan J. Trunk @DolanTrunk]

My good friend and side-kick Mark Pance has been recently informed me that @Rosie is the one who interfered and defrauded our election. Sad! The @FBI has informed me that she has been spotted off the coast of Alaska migrating south with the rest of the whales.

[Dolan J. Trunk @DolanTrunk]

The Fake News media has been saying that I’m the tremendously handsome Donald J Trump which is frankly not true. Millions if not billions of people have been saying this is probably just another witch hunt. TOTALLY FALSE!

[Dolan J. Trunk @DolanTrunk]

Frankly, a lot of people lately have been saying that Jack Dorsey looks like a homeless man. And believe me I know the best homeless people that live outside of Trunk Tower. And frankly they’re terrific people unlike Jack. Total Fraud!

[Dolan J. Trunk @DolanTrunk]

Listen, frankly I’m new to Twitter. Never had a previous account probably ever. But we will make Twitter great again and believe me, no one knows twits like I do. That I can tell you.