Don “The Donald” Trumpet

It’s all part of the joke

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump So long you fucking button

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump You’re actually so tapped brother hahaha

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump Bro you riding that gravy train straight to hell

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump Miraculously (praise Alah). After completing surgery the top of the crucifix is unable to be removed from Jordan’s brain and we slowly go through a metamorphosis into a god fearing, gun toating, pro life, MAGA hat wearing, innocent black man shooting American 🇺🇸🐽!

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump The cars collide head on and, the force of which snaps the crucifix off the neck of our trump supporter (played by Mathew mcconaughey) and drives into the skill of our non- American protagonist (Michael B. Jordan). The result of the crash kill mcconaughey (rip) but Jordan survive

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump As she puffs away at your soul, the ashes and embers fall down through the different realms of time and space and become planets and meteorites. As she exhales, the smoke of your soul clears and becomes the stars in the sky

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump You are brought face to face with the mother of the universe - a wholly beautiful and Devine being. She lifts you up to her mouth, wets the length of your bedsheet with her ethereal tongue and rolls you up nice and tight. She strikes her fingers together and sparks you up gently.

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump Aye ano man - proper crazy! Another thing that may shock you is when I was about 15 I had an erection in the bath and, somehow or another, pissed on my own face!

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump You must be drinking that Mongolian horse milk, brother.

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump The comparison is clear and obvious in my eyes

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump What I mean by this is that just as a burrata is one type of cheese with a somewhat watterier/creamier inside, soo too does a human have a multitude of cells on the outside and a waterier, creamier inside

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump Mental how my gran has spent 70 years smoking a 20 deck a day and eating exclusively french fancies and pineapple cakes

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump @RandPaul How much public pool water could you drink before it was better off for you to just let a small child empty their bladder into your mouth

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

How many times larger would ants need to be for them to consume all the matter on earth, and how long would it take?

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump It’s okay that you hate Muslims - they hate you too. Salaah molekum brother lick my clit

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

Please be nice to each other. The foreign guy sitting at the front of the bus shouting and screaming could just have really bad IBS.

[Don “The Donald” Trumpet @DonTheDonaldTr1]

@realDonaldTrump How much of a bath full of cocopops could you eat before the milk turned sour