Devlin

back i guess. Formerly known as Viking, currently known as the crackwhore behind your local Walgreens.

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

Imagine fighting in a real war and you see a snapshot grenade fly in over the horizon before some kid fuckin lasers you with an AS-VAL from three zipcodes away and calls your the n word. #modernwarfare

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

us army: wanna get shot in vietnam?

dudes: no

army: we will play fortunate son in every helicopter the entire time

dudes: take me now

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

hey @elonmusk if you're such hot shit, invent a banana that doesn't go brown after three days

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

Once I saw someone order pizza and not eat the crust, but that bitch ate a whole order of breadsticks with the pizza. Do you not realize what you're doing?

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

thought I woke up to an earthquake this morning but it turns out my neighbor with a samsung just got a text

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

people can just walk around with a midwestern accent and you'll never know. hidden in plain sight. horrifying.

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

dj khaled is the donald trump of music, okay see ya next year Twitter

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

@King_Waffle @R0baF3tt it is, fam. Up to 10 people, most fun with 3-4 imo

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

what the fuck is iHeartRadio

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

who do u think would win in a fight, hall or oates? my money's on oates with a third round knockout

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

If you want people to talk to you just get a @hulu account, then you'll see who your real friends were.

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

but also fuck sbmm, i wanna thrash noobs

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

#SBMM is frustrating, but imagine making it to the Superbowl then being mad that you have to play against the other team that also won their playoff games.

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

Until I put my contacts in, Paul McCartney and Hillary Clinton are the same person

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

This is just a @DeusEx trailer bro

[GoArmy @GoArmy]

You can make a difference. There are over 150 ways to make your mark. Find out how.

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

A bad one too. No nice Scandanavian penitentiary for you

[Sean Rogers @SpacemanSR]

If you dip pizza into ranch or mayo or ketchup you need to be locked in a penitentiary

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

@hxstlerette Nah fuck you, I wanna live in pain

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

@FaZeClan @GShock_US Bro this shit looks like the hotwheels watch I wanted in 2nd grade

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

governments should announce things like shitty rap labels lmao imagine "New legislation dropping at 7CST👀⏰, 500 RT'S for a TEASER 🔥🔥🍽💵💵"

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

i got half a million skymiles but that shit can't ever take me back to my Xbox 360 Minecraft world from 2012 😔

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

Still a really dope mouse, but my last two fingers got NO support and I look like I'm gaming with upside down Italian hands.

[Devlin @DoubleDevlin]

bro when did gaming mice get so small. Just bought a @LogitechG G502 and I gotta use it with tweezers bc they had to make it 0.0003 nanograms or some CSGO type shit