I get heated when the restroom code is too easy. Like, first you tell me you don’t trust me. Now you’re telling me I’m too dumb to remember 12345? I don’t even want this chicken sandwich anymore!!!
Watching a video about mythicals. Narrator is being condescending about unicorns. “We know now that the horns came from narwhals, because OBVIOUSLY unicorns aren’t real.”
Like damn, facts. Only an idiot would think those were horse horns. We all know horns only come from whales
Sometimes I get paranoid that I’m doing a bad job as a pet haver but this dumbass was gonna be alive no matter what choice I made and I feed him, play with him, and scratch his stupid head all the time so truly how much worse could he have had it?
I’m literally out in public enjoying myself and all i can think about is how I like the new Pokémon and that this really funny game is wasted on all these fucking entitled dorks
I am not a gatekeeper and I’m happy to see people enjoy things they like and nostalgia etc, but imagine you see a person wearing a Chicago bears shirt, approaching them like “football, right?” And them answering “fuck no, I haven’t seen a single game since I was twelve”
Favorite part of being a Pokémon fan is seeing a person in public wearing Pokémon merch and approaching them like “yo, Pokémon?” And them being like “no, literally only squirtle and zero other Pokémon”
The monthly comedy show I co-produce with @DrewJFahey is this Friday. We have a great lineup of comics booked and we'll also have a few giveaways at the end. Don't miss this one.
I’ve been on this website for a decade and if I had a nickel for every time the narrative was “it’s bad here” I could probably also afford to buy Twitter