Drake Otto

2011 backyard pool wrestling champion

[Gretchen Lynn @Bubola]

Lmao Bill Burr is a national treasure 😂
https://t.co/A2KpotnXq6

[mark normand @marknorm]

Women want a man who's successful, men want a woman who gets movie references.

[bob saget @bobsaget]

Oh. My. God. I spend my day cleaning and vacuuming and sanitizing everything in the house. I have become Danny Tanner.

[Tim Dillon @TimJDillon]

I hope we survive as a country but I can’t think of a population that deserves to survive less.

[Luis J. Gomez @luisjgomez]

Celebrities patting themselves on the backs for self-quarantining can fuck off. You have mansions with private gyms and movie theaters.

[Luis J. Gomez @luisjgomez]

Is there anything more privileged than singing John Lennon songs in your mansion?

[Mykie @GlamandGore]

#BernieWon the #DemDebate . Pass it on.

[Luis J. Gomez @luisjgomez]

Is it “ok boomer!” Or “what about the poor old people!”? Pick a lane!

[Capricorn Jenkins @WesDRoberts]

@Miny_K You know what; I think we’ve pretty much served our purpose as far as a species is concerned we can close up shop.

[Tim Dillon @TimJDillon]

When we build a new society after this one crashes let’s remember all the hucksters, con men, and liars we exalted and all the scientists and experts we ignored.

[Ray Kump @RayKump]

Why doesn’t the C.I.A. just use sexual blackmail against the virus?

[Drake Otto @Driz14]

@steintheplug A bidet would solve the problem

[Tim Allen @ofctimallen]

@tomhanks Woody,
I should have made you two wear my space suits! You and Rita rest and get well!

[Drake Otto @Driz14]

If you’re a smoker then you know that morning cigarette hits different

[Drake Otto @Driz14]

“You ever notice how the people who believe in creationism look really unevolved?” -Bill Hicks

[Stavros Halkias @stavvybaby]

Everyone voting for Elizabeth Warren today is still mad they lost a highschool student government election to popular kid who was running as a joke

[Drake Otto @Driz14]

@NoelleFaen Aye zeal & ardor 🤘🏼

[Phil Demers @walruswhisperer]

California Senator Introduces Bill to Shut Down SeaWorld https://t.co/qGQAt5J3P2