Egg Sandwich

smelly cheese and dirty knees

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

Just sneezed farted and burped all at once.
I'm calling it a snarp

[Paddington @paddingtonbear]

I think it's time for a cup of tea with a shortbread biscuit.

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

I miss getting spam calls

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

How many gherkins in one sitting is too many?

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

Bought something on my new credit card tonight ...and then I bought something else ... and then I bought something else...I don't think I should have a credit card...

#onlyinitforthecreditscore

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

https://t.co/2deIpdtqlb

The world didn't know it needed this Idris Elba and Lime Cordiale collab but I am grateful 🙏

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

*This is a reminder to cut your toenails*

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

Fell backwards into a pyramid of popcorn tonight

Slapstick comedy at its best

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

Today I had some marmalade ice cream 😋

[did lorde release a new album today @DidLorde]

lorde just released a new album with some of solar power songs but in maori language

https://t.co/7jURIB3tug

[Cher @cher]

Ok,This is going 2 Sound, Well I Don’t Know,but I was on my phone longer than ever Before,since last time We Talked,& I BURNED MY LEFT PALM,& IT GOT SWOLLEN,R PALM NOT NEARLY AS BAD,BUT HAD 2 HOLD A BOWL OF ICE.WHEN I WOKE UP COULDN’T
BEND LEFT WRIST😣It’s
Still not perfect

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

Can confirm I am now a flipper expert

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

Bought some flippers today 🤭😁

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

Anyone selling a ticket for Will and The People in Brighton on the 24th ...

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

@y_yag_ *in progress*

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

Just discovered that I've been walking around the house with butter on my big toe. And now I'm quite attached to the little fella

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

Just remembered the time when a load of moths flew out my jacket on the underground once 😅💀

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

Reflection: the fact that my immediate reaction to getting my first period was that I thought my life was over, rather than feeling empowered saddens and devastates me.

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

Just been accepted into the Eurovision Fans FB group! 😍🥳

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

Feel like the UK population just watch Eurovision to vibe to all the other countries bangers.

We've accepted we will never win AND that's okay.

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

I LOVE EUROVISION

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

@stephyag I'll have to do some research and get some chalk ready for my next trip to @y_yag_ !

[Egg Sandwich @EdEddAndEddd]

I have a sudden urge to play hopscotch but also cannot remember how to play it ...frustrating