Edward Stockwell

A real dumb-dumb.

[Edward Stockwell @EdwardStockwell]

I know it's just Twitter amplifying the worst voices but jfc gamers are such weird fucking babies do you actually like the person you are?

[Edward Stockwell @EdwardStockwell]

You just created a million Scott Pelleys

[Elijah Wood @elijahwood]

For the first time yesterday, I experienced the new @alamodrafthouse QR code ordering system and I can tell you it’s truly awful. Rather than making ordering food and drink more efficient, it actually adds steps to the process AND if you want to order additional items during the film you HAVE to open your phone. No, your cute reference to that irony in your How To Alamo video doesn’t negate how ridiculous this is. Please don’t cut corners with your staff and revert back to physical menus and order cards.

[Edward Stockwell @EdwardStockwell]

@WhiteHouse Not at all an ominous thing to read!

[Edward Stockwell @EdwardStockwell]

Finally beat Tears of the Kingdom lol. What a game!

[Rick Perry @GovernorPerry]

Ken Paxton initially offered a plea deal to a MAN WHO ADMITTED TO MOLESTING a child to serve only ONE DAY IN JAIL. #txsen

[Edward Stockwell @EdwardStockwell]

It's so funny how much Asmongold inadvertently recreates the c*mtown Jordan Peterson "umm actually it's gay to get p-ssy" bit

[bloom 𖧧 @bloomjpg]

Asmongold claps back after Stavros Halkias says he gets no p-ssy

"Shut up fatty.. So many men that are leftist use it as a mating technique.. They don't actually believe any of this sh-t.. They just say it because it's a good way to get women to like them."

"I don't have a girlfriend, maybe in the future I will.. They're simps.. It's all about having s-x with women.. It's kind of sad, really.. I don't like talking about relationships.. I don't need to prove anything."

[Nude Gunray @Nude_Gunray]

This is the most horrifying scene in Star Wars

[Edward Stockwell @EdwardStockwell]

@SpeakerJohnson Bro just balanced the budget after receiving a $12B deficit, maybe a few more mini Mamdanis around the country will help idk

[Edward Stockwell @EdwardStockwell]

lower east side girlies are saying "Sister Golden Hair" is the song of the summer

[luca @lucam8a]

odyssey skepticism on My Timeline

[david ehrlich @davidehrlich]

Kacey Musgraves reviews calling her new album a return to form… weird thing to say about someone who only puts out 10/10 records but okay i'm very excited

[Edward Stockwell @EdwardStockwell]

I think this quote is being misconstrued as "work for free" but I read it more as finding yourself a hobby or passion that you enjoy doing and living for that instead of work. Not trying to monetize it, just enjoying your free time.

[Film Updates @FilmUpdates]

Emily Blunt shares advice for girls who are unhappy with their jobs:

“Just find something that you deeply want to do. Even if you’re earning no money, as long as you love it, you’ll be happy.”

[Edward Stockwell @EdwardStockwell]

Using the tongs at the Whole Foods hot bar to give the buffalo chicken bites a little squeeze like I’m checking the ripeness of an avocado

[Integrity Guy @Integrity_Freak]

[putting my arm around you at your lowest moment] Afraid I’m gonna have to betray ya, big dog 😬

[Edward Stockwell @EdwardStockwell]

getting my head blown smoove off after the private behind me achoos really loudly behind enemy lines

[Secretary of War Pete Hegseth @SecWar]

The War Department is once again restoring freedom to our Joint Force.

We are discarding the mandatory flu vaccine requirement, effective immediately.

[Dave Itzkoff @ditzkoff]

WERNER HERZOG: "The Simpsons" is a bold intellectual design.

INTERVIEWER: in what way?

HERZOG: Let's not analyze it.

https://t.co/LHtshiaidw

[Edward Stockwell @EdwardStockwell]

You’re either marveling at the quiet beauty of a spring morn with me or you’re marveling at the quiet beauty of a spring morn against me

[Edward Stockwell @EdwardStockwell]

George Strait? Uhh idk I’ve never asked him

[Mike Drucker @MikeDrucker]

“lmao i’m not in a cult, bro, I’ve just got all these pics saved of my favorite politician as Jesus because it offends the libs! lol they hate my many private AI photos of him as a jacked god. I’ve also got his name on most of my clothes and my car and in every room of my house”