Julia Elfred

Parish administrator, priest’s wife, Granny to 5 grandchildren.

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@marksandspencer where do I find an email address to write a complaint? I’ve searched everywhere!

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@VictoriaCoren I’m so glad you posted this because I hadn’t a clue what rhymes with Prussian!

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@bluhue123 🙋🏼‍♀️

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@txsalth2o When my (now adult) children were at the party age I never did party bags. Several parents told me I was “brave” yet none of them followed suit but moaned at the cost and waste of party bags. 🤷🏼‍♀️

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@Heaven_ali I’ve read them all. Good gentle reading.

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@GaryScribbler Congratulations to you both.

[CALL TO ACTIVISM @CalltoActivism]

A British writer penned the best description of Donald Trump I’ve ever read:

“Why do some British people not like Donald Trump?”

A few things spring to mind. Trump lacks certain qualities which the British traditionally esteem. For instance, he has no class, no charm, no coolness, no credibility, no compassion, no wit, no warmth, no wisdom, no subtlety, no sensitivity, no self-awareness, no humility, no honour and no grace – all qualities, funnily enough, with which his predecessor Mr. Obama was generously blessed. So for us, the stark contrast does rather throw Trump’s limitations into embarrassingly sharp relief.

Plus, we like a laugh. And while Trump may be laughable, he has never once said anything wry, witty or even faintly amusing – not once, ever. I don’t say that rhetorically, I mean it quite literally: not once, not ever. And that fact is particularly disturbing to the British sensibility – for us, to lack humour is almost inhuman. But with Trump, it’s a fact. He doesn’t even seem to understand what a joke is – his idea of a joke is a crass comment, an illiterate insult, a casual act of cruelty.

Trump is a troll. And like all trolls, he is never funny and he never laughs; he only crows or jeers. And scarily, he doesn’t just talk in crude, witless insults – he actually thinks in them. His mind is a simple bot-like algorithm of petty prejudices and knee-jerk nastiness.

There is never any under-layer of irony, complexity, nuance or depth. It’s all surface. Some Americans might see this as refreshingly upfront. Well, we don’t. We see it as having no inner world, no soul. And in Britain we traditionally side with David, not Goliath. All our heroes are plucky underdogs: Robin Hood, Dick Whittington, Oliver Twist. Trump is neither plucky, nor an underdog. He is the exact opposite of that. He’s not even a spoiled rich-boy, or a greedy fat-cat. He’s more a fat white slug. A Jabba the Hutt of privilege.

And worse, he is that most unforgivable of all things to the British: a bully. That is, except when he is among bullies; then he suddenly transforms into a snivelling sidekick instead. There are unspoken rules to this stuff – the Queensberry rules of basic decency – and he breaks them all. He punches downwards – which a gentleman should, would, could never do – and every blow he aims is below the belt. He particularly likes to kick the vulnerable or voiceless – and he kicks them when they are down.

So the fact that a significant minority – perhaps a third – of Americans look at what he does, listen to what he says, and then think ‘Yeah, he seems like my kind of guy’ is a matter of some confusion and no little distress to British people, given that:

• Americans are supposed to be nicer than us, and mostly are.

• You don’t need a particularly keen eye for detail to spot a few flaws in the man.

This last point is what especially confuses and dismays British people, and many other people too; his faults seem pretty bloody hard to miss. After all, it’s impossible to read a single tweet, or hear him speak a sentence or two, without staring deep into the abyss. He turns being artless into an art form; he is a Picasso of pettiness; a Shakespeare of shit. His faults are fractal: even his flaws have flaws, and so on ad infinitum.

God knows there have always been stupid people in the world, and plenty of nasty people too. But rarely has stupidity been so nasty, or nastiness so stupid. He makes Nixon look trustworthy and George W look smart. In fact, if Frankenstein decided to make a monster assembled entirely from human flaws – he would make a Trump.

And a remorseful Doctor Frankenstein would clutch out big clumpfuls of hair and scream in anguish: ‘My God… what… have… I… created?' If being a twat was a TV show, Trump would be the boxed set.”

-Nate White

[Dave McPartlin @dave_mcpartlin]

Have spoken to hundreds of heads & teachers across England who are all saying exactly the same - the number of children who need additional support in schools is unprecedented.

We need significantly more SEN provision, proper funding and a Plan B.

Councils and Govt need to move at speed and with a flexibility they are not used to or set up for.

We can’t just wait for the General Election - it’s not fair on the children, the families or colleagues - they all deserve better.

Pennies saved now will cost pounds later and take years to undo.

Our politicians are not rising to the challenge, but WE are.

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@richardosman Preordered mine! Roll on September!

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@SESWater why have you closed off access to Trumpets Hill Road? Roadworks are not starting until Monday. Plus those of us who live that side of the roadworks are unable to get past your stupid signs

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@UKPowerNetworks Done.

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@UKPowerNetworks what amazing service! I called last night to report a tree leaning on the overhead power cable. Engineers attended within the hour and the tree has gone. In these days of poor service, you guys were amazing!

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@UKPowerNetworks plus call handler Craig was really great - calm, clear, friendly yet professional.

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@CallTheMidwife1 @BBCOne What a tearjerker!

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

The first book in this year’s #readChristie2024 challenge is The Mysterious Affair at Styles. A good read!

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@mrhaydon14 The word legend is often overused, but not in this case. A true gent and, yes, legend!

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@apsitjen @HallDavidson @DiscoveryEd Hi Jen, I’m just starting my voyage of discovery with AI in my new role. Very exciting to learn more about this incredible resource.

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@bbcsoutheast Why did we have East Anglian local news this evening?

[Jen Hall, NBCT @apsitjen]

It’s a marvelous Monday. October is #LGBTQ History Month.
Did you know the colors of the pride flag 🏳️‍🌈 have a meaning?
❤️ Life
🧡 Healing
💛 Sunlight
💚 Nature
💙 Harmony
💜 Spirit
T-Shirt # 65

[Julia Elfred @ElfredJulia]

@SouthwarkCofE @deansouthwark @BishopSouthwark @Southwarkcathed Praying for them all, especially for Kerry.