Erasmie

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees.

$30 per seat per month.

$1.4 million annually.

I called it "digital transformation."

The board loved that phrase.

They approved it in eleven minutes.

No one asked what it would actually do.

Including me.

I told everyone it would "10x productivity."

That's not a real number.

But it sounds like one.

HR asked how we'd measure the 10x.

I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards."

They stopped asking.

Three months later I checked the usage reports.

47 people had opened it.

12 had used it more than once.

One of them was me.

I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds.

It took 45 seconds.

Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations.

But I called it a "pilot success."

Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.

The CFO asked about ROI.

I showed him a graph.

The graph went up and to the right.

It measured "AI enablement."

I made that metric up.

He nodded approvingly.

We're "AI-enabled" now.

I don't know what that means.

But it's in our investor deck.

A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT.

I said we needed "enterprise-grade security."

He asked what that meant.

I said "compliance."

He asked which compliance.

I said "all of them."

He looked skeptical.

I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."

He stopped asking questions.

Microsoft sent a case study team.

They wanted to feature us as a success story.

I told them we "saved 40,000 hours."

I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up.

They didn't verify it.

They never do.

Now we're on Microsoft's website.

"Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot."

The CEO shared it on LinkedIn.

He got 3,000 likes.

He's never used Copilot.

None of the executives have.

We have an exemption.

"Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."

I wrote that policy.

The licenses renew next month.

I'm requesting an expansion.

5,000 more seats.

We haven't used the first 4,000.

But this time we'll "drive adoption."

Adoption means mandatory training.

Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.

But completion will be tracked.

Completion is a metric.

Metrics go in dashboards.

Dashboards go in board presentations.

Board presentations get me promoted.

I'll be SVP by Q3.

I still don't know what Copilot does.

But I know what it's for.

It's for showing we're "investing in AI."

Investment means spending.

Spending means commitment.

Commitment means we're serious about the future.

The future is whatever I say it is.

As long as the graph goes up and to the right.

[Erasmie @Erasmie]

@bjorn_ohlsson https://t.co/JQ77Ix9r6v

[Aaron Rupar @atrupar]

Gonna say something controversial — this sounds really good

[Erasmie @Erasmie]

Trump låter ju helt normal

[Aaron Rupar @atrupar]

Trump to a reporter who asks him about Russia breaking a ceasefire: "What if a bomb drops on your head right now ... Putin went through a hell of a lot with me. He went through a phony witch hunt."

[Oskar Månsson @oskar_mansson]

Breaking news:

Det är supertryggt att gå på fotboll.

Fri läsning.
https://t.co/IQ5dopbd4Q

[Hankins @markushankins]

Det är närmast farsartat hur Blåvitts tekniska direktör vid 100% av möjliga tillfällen är i media och säger saker som visar sig vara den diametrala motsatsen till vad som faktiskt sker - så både han personligen, men också hela föreningen, ser ut som fullständiga klåpare. #ifkgbg

[Dumber than a Bowl full of Mice #Fella 🇺🇸🇺🇦 @BowlOfMice]

Bit of a long 🧵 but I promise, it is actually going somewhere, not just a rant on Trump's cabinet picks.

But the rant part first:

Marco Rubio (Sec of State)
- More or less qualified, but has become a whipped dog, begging for his master's love, since 2016

1/15

[Erasmie @Erasmie]

@SparGeneralen @Cornubot Det är jättedyrt att flyga till Spanien över jul också tyvärr

[Erasmie @Erasmie]

@bjorn_ohlsson Apropå vadå?

[Republicans against Trump @RpsAgainstTrump]

Mike Pence: “The American people deserve to know that President Trump and his advisers didn't just ask me to pause, they asked me to reject votes, to return votes, essentially to overturn the election.”
(2023)
https://t.co/sJY74xbYUY

[Hannes Hervieu @HannesHervieu]

Så spännande!!

[Headquarters @HQNewsNow]

The people who know Trump best won’t support him.

Why should you?

A thread

[Acyn @Acyn]

Voter: I am a Republican that’s no longer registered. Your inaction during your presidency was a little disturbing to me. What happened during January 6th and the fact that you waited so long to take action while your supporters were attacking the Capitol. Coronavirus, I thought the public was misled and many more lives could’ve been saved.. I’m curious how people close to you in your administration don’t want to support you so why would I support you? Your own VP doesn’t want to support you.

[Erasmie @Erasmie]

Men som vanligt händer väl ingenting

[James Connor @toJamesConnor]

1. The evidence presented in Jack Smith’s filing all comes from Trump insiders under oath. People within Trump’s circle of trust. Republicans dedicated to Trump.

[James Connor @toJamesConnor]

1. The evidence presented in Jack Smith’s filing all comes from Trump insiders under oath. People within Trump’s circle of trust. Republicans dedicated to Trump.

[Erasmie @Erasmie]

Som ett avsnitt av Veep

[Fredrik Sjödin @MrWaternooze]

Du kan ta sossen ur pampen, men inte pampen ur sossen.

[Simon Hennix @simonhennix]

Billborn & Björklund i IFK Göteborg:

10 matcher.
8 poäng.

7 förlorade poäng har uppstått på grund av baklängesmål på tilläggstid. Anmärkningsvärt. #ifkgbg

[Gianni Butticè @GianniButtice]

If you love the Champions League, give up 4 minutes of your time to watch this. And give Zlatan an Oscar.