eric vance curl

Omega mail

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

tweeting a billboard is like live streaming a game of Zork

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@Metra my monthly pass just got a 35% price hike and limited to my line and zone, and the only words you have on that today: marketing drivel including the phrase “a great deal” but not including actual information.
it’s like a hat on a hat but with kicks in the crotch instead of hats.

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@dankmccoy and i know he's irish. the character is english. plus, he is an OBE despite not being a british citizen, which i think makes him more british than most brits.

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@dankmccoy alas, Dr Fate could have finally been the role Brosnan was meant to play: a charming but mysterious englishman who's always saving the world while somehow making weirdly-old-fashioned look cool-as-hell

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

so when is @_joshfudge going to be on @heyriddleriddle? this is an inevitable event, lets pin it down.

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@_joshfudge @heyriddleriddle haven't finished that @heyriddleriddle ep because i am still bathing my soul in the etherial vibes of Fudge. they did this before with a metallica mailbag theme song. i listened to the first three albums--ride the lightning twice--before going back to the pod.

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@erinrbowles i’ve read the books several times, and delved into JRRT’s scholarly works and personal essays, but you will never get Merry and Pippin’s relationship until you understand that that Merry is Team Edward while Pippin is Team Jacob.

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

the only place in Hell worse than the one reserved for the person who invented the car alarm is the place in hell next to the one reserved for the person who invented the car alarm.

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

do trans-hostile people get angry at light, because they don't know if they should call it a particle or a wave?

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@stefabsky add Carl's Jr. to the list. does Carl have a Junior? if he did, wouldn't that just be Carl Jr.? the Carl is possessive. does Carl just OWN Junior? whose junior is Junior? owning people is a famously Bad Thing: why don't they just call them all Hardee's!?

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@dankmccoy In the chill of night,
At the scene of the crime
Like a streak of light
He SPUMPCs just in time

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

it feels like Emily Brontë is going to sue the weather for copyright infringement

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@OffBookPod needs more Clark in 2022. i just re-listened to 212 and i am obsessed with Clark and the fund he trusts. i dare #offbookpod #musical to include Clark in every episode of 2022. --drops mic in front of completely empty auditorium-- #clark2022 #makeamericaClarkagain

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@ShariaUncle please post the address of this place because it's not showing up in google and i will absolutely get on a train and walk however far it takes from Ogalvie to give these people money. also you are required to record an episode of anime sickos in this place, while eating corn dogs

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@ShariaUncle i see. totally get that. but there is no reason they cant slowly introduce all the old mundane but great stuff back on top of the stupid/brilliant gimmick of king kong corn dogs. i have never wanted to eat a corn dog as much as i do right now.

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@ShariaUncle if they also sell funnel cakes they should get a joint nobel prize for economics/peace/chemistry and Aubrey Plaza should unironically give them a trophy
because that would be weird and awesome and perfect. i'm pretty sure she'd be down with that. because she is almost that weird.

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@ShariaUncle okay, i'm going all in on this. if a business in a beautiful old building shuts down and another one takes over, what could possibly be better than a corn dog joint with obviously unauthorized king kong branding? i'm kind of amazed that you're not already friends with the owners.

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@ShariaUncle there are so many much worse things that could inhabit a building in your neighborhood. if i turned the corner in my garbage suburb and saw this sign i would shit my pants with joy. goddam it i'd give a pint of my blood to burn my mouth on a corn dog from a corner store right now

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@MIDImyers you have uncannily captured the way i feel about the A-Team, except that i am not at all tempted to revisit the A-Team, because, unlike female ghostbusters, watching the A-Team as an adult would actually literally ruin my childhood

[eric vance curl @EricVanceCurl]

@darinmbob @GOP dude. just… yes