Fire Emblem Anything Bot

A bot by @bindingblade that makes up random Fire Emblem stuff every hour or so. Feel free to DM ideas!! EVERYTHING HERE IS A JOKE.

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Wanna know which FE character you are? Reply with or tag the bot in either of these phrases and it'll give you one. Just a warning, to prevent spam there's a 5% chance of it ignoring you:

assign me
Assign me

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Cain was just cancelled for not paying their taxes!

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

One will protect you. The others will try to hunt you down - Rhea, Sothe, Lyon, and Dimitri.

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Lucius kins you.

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Corrin is obviously a better character than Constance, anyone who disagrees is wrong.

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

You can live in a castle, but you have to room with Quan and Constance, are you staying?

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Julia and Lucius are both about to be run over by approximately 33984 horses but you can only rescue one, who are you saving?

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Fates is better than Shadow Dragon and the Blade of Light and we both know it.

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Innes has been banned from the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse for embezzlement.

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Rhea has explosive diarrhea.

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Shadow Dragon is better than Shadow Dragon and the Blade of Light and we both know it.

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

One will protect you. The others will try to hunt you down - Rinkah, Julia, Lysithea, and Shinon.

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Dimitri kins Patrick Bateman.

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Seth has a gun!

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Due to recent controversies, Petra's new VA is going to be Millie Bobby Brown.

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Felix just caught Lucius crying to the ending of the Minions movie.

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Lethe and Manuela are teaming up to fight Eliwood!

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Finn has joined the MCU!

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Lute was just cancelled for manslaughter!

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Serra is rapidly approaching your current location.

[Fire Emblem Anything Bot @FEAnythingBot]

Three Houses is better than Shadow Dragon and we both know it.