Fake Paramount

The great all knowing film company! (This is all satire and I expect you all to take it as satire. This is not affiliated with Paramount)

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

MOVE OVER AVENGERS! Since we’ll own @warnerbros soon and because you’re probably severely disappointed in the new Avengers trailer, here’s @JamesGunn to give you a sneak peak of DC’s newest superhero film which he promised us will make a billion worldwide. If not, we call Snyder

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

We’re pleased to announce that we have cast the role of Freddy Kreuger in our upcoming A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET reboot. Just narrowly beating out Elliot Page in the audition process, @MichelleObama is your newest Freddy Krueger! Congratulations Michelle!

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

We own @MTV & have decided to give you one last music video. This MV is entitled HYDE WARS. It’s about Sam Hyde @wigger & his battles with Joe Bernstein @Bernstein Hasan Piker @hasanthehun @Idubbbz Tim Heidecker @OfficeHrsLive and Brett Gelman @brettgelman It’s a warrior’s tale.

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

COMING SOON TO @paramountplus A new hilarious and romantic TV event, BARACK AND BUTTHEAD: A LOVE STORY

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

Sam Hyde will return as Trex in ‘AVENGERS DOOMSDAY.’

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

Michelle Obama will return as Big Mike in ‘AVENGERS DOOMSDAY.’

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

Frederic Forrest will return as Surplus Store Owner in ‘AVENGERS DOOMSDAY.’

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

Gordon Jump will return as Mr. Horton in ‘AVENGERS DOOMSDAY.’

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

Daniel Carver will return as the Grandmaster Of The KKK in ‘AVENGERS DOOMSDAY.’

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

John Waters brings you your new favorite podcast https://t.co/7F3OYD5nnV

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

For 8 minutes 46 seconds, in solidarity with our sister TV networks in the ViacomCBS family, Paramount’s corporate social channels will use photoshop to put John Boyega on the Chinese Poster of @Starwars after @Disney and @KathyLucasfilm left him off to make more money in China.

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

Sign this petition so we can finally get the @ZackSyder cut of DANGEROUS PEOPLE https://t.co/if9b9Z3t4b

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

Congrats to Tiffany Moore for winning the lead role in Jill Soloway’s RED SONJA movie!

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

Good question!

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

Congrats to Bryan Singer on landing the RED SONJA directing gig! You’ve truly earned the nickname “The Teflon Pedophile”!

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

We blame Deplorables, Bernie Bros, Wikileaks, low information voters, sexism, self hating women, James Comey, Anthony Weiner, Jill Stein, the electoral college, and Russia for SOLO bombing.

[Fake Paramount @FakeParamount]

Buy our shirt and wear it this weekend! #BlackPanther #wakanda #marvel https://t.co/gqlqY53Vk6