Fake Steve Dike

The judge said I can't watch Toddlers and Tiaras anymore, so I hang out at a high school all day. Little old for me, but they suffice.

[Tyler Gates @Tyler_Gates]

If this tweet gets RT 50 times I'll tattoo TWITTER on my chest

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

Merry XXXmas to all my favorite freshmen, can't wait for the next detentions

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

Can't wait for the class of 2012 to graduate, our janitorial staff needs some new faces

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

Breakfast. YUM!

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

Sorry for the long absence, ever since Jerry and Bernie got caught I've been laying low.

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

#thatawkwardmoment when the secretary asks why I have red hair in my mouth after a meeting with the quarterback.

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

#PrincipalProblems = No Child Left Behind. Listen retards, God left you behind... Don't think I won't.

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

Getting an email from a 15 yr. old saying she's going to keep the baby. #PrincipalProblems

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

Dreaming of having some guido arms wrapped around me someday. Until then I'll settle for @D_Scan12 ;) #GETBIG #torqued

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

..although the damn things came unglazed! Fixed that with an old episode of Saved By The Bell and 20 minutes in my office. #SLAATEER

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

Paid for the staff meeting donuts today with YOUR money, thanks kids!

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

got pulled ova by Lansing pigs, handed back the breathalyzer and said "dat muh fugga iz #ROLLIN"

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

Daylight Donuts opens today in LV. Not to be confused with everyone's favorite #DARE officer #DuncanBlonuts

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

Poking fun at the HS principal is one thing, cyber bullying students is another. Whoever created "Lansing Uncovered" will go down.

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

UMMMM, CAN YOU SAY BEST FATHER'S DAY GIFT EVER?!?! That was no accident baby girl leaving the bathroom door unlocked... WAS IT! #ahhh :)

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

I don't have all the answers, I'm just a high school principal. The few times I got positive scores on tests, they were for STD's.

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

@RealChuckDiesel Just the tip?

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

@RealChuckDiesel you should post a dickpic to gain followers. I mean I wouldn't look at it or anything, just to get followers you know...

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

I hope it's fluorescent! #sillybugaboo RT @Chelsea_Jhaay @FakeSteveDike I hope God strikes you with lighting...

[Fake Steve Dike @FakeSteveDike]

anybody want to go with me to the baseball fields to watch some games? my usual buddy won't answer his phone?! #whereareyouofficerduncan