Tom Sanchez

just fucking punk rock the fuck out of it every single time

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

@RepAndyBiggsAZ Can someone in your offices answer the phone?

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

@CryptoLawyerz Lmao bunch of sore losers

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

The holidays are about getting high and telling your parents dogs how much you love them.

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

Brb following all Olympic divers on insta

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

@mollykiernan You do weed now?

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

More like, body-ody-ody of Christ, am I right?

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

@mollykiernan @BillGates You would too!

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

Just putting this out there, but I would bottom for @BillGates.

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

@ybbaaabby WHERE DID YOU GET THIS ALLEGED "COLD BREW"??!!

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

@BrennanCaldwell The Cheetah Girls by Deborah Wilson

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

I'm at the "eating ice cream in bed while simultaneously looking up group fitness classes" stage of my 30s.

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

@ybbaaabby ON MY COUCH ABBY

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

@ybbaaabby STOP WALKING IN ON ME AT WORK

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

@ybbaaabby Abby I'll text you back soon. My gf and I are just busy having lots of sex!

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

@ybbaaabby Which one are you?

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

@jordanmyr1ck He's hot, so he is therefore a good and talented actor

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

Find yourself a job you love, and you'll never work a day in your life.

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

@ybbaaabby Two tops can't fall in love. It's in the Bible

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

@ybbaaabby Please stop referring to me as your "soul mate" and "the one that got away"

[Tom Sanchez @FakeTomSanchez]

@ybbaaabby Yes. Absolutely. No question.