Feltching Green Village Council

Feltching Green Village Council Official twitter page. Subscribe for your latest feltching news & local events. Please DM us directly with village news #parody.

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

While it's not 7pm yet I've decided to promote/release the front page of the local paper early but I am unwell. I have a severe migraine and can barely see. I've decided to take a drive to help clear it. Thank you. Enjoy!
#Cummgate #classicdomexcuses #savecummings

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

After carful consideration we've decided to abandon the twitter page for.. Well, obvious reasons. We are a very right wing village..but not this right wing. Please feel free to follow us at our FB page:
https://t.co/SBxLrk6mFO

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

Today in Feltching Green:
We're having a Tea Party aimed at the female over 95's in The #martipellow Inn in the high street. The organisers would like to make it EXTREMELY clear that you MUST be over 95 and female to attend. This includes carers, chaperones etc.

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

Looks like we're on Google!! The council is so proud <3
#villagenews #villagepeople #LGBTQ

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

We ask that all our residents in Feltching Green to NOT partake in this crude & childish rebellion of our Democratically elected PM Boris Johnson. We all voted for him.
Your Money would be better spent on tickets to the Pat Sharp community centre reopening fete.
#BORIS4XMASNO1

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

@UKBreturn They're busy storming a peaceful vigil for a lady that was killed by a policeman who had recently been released for exposure.... Women holding candles are much easier to brutalise compared to pissed up footy fans.

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

BREAKING NEWS:
A protest was held today in Feltching Green to demand that something is done about the #heatwave after the
@metoffice announced an extreme heat warning. Mr Hardwick, the organiser says"It's too bloody hot.Whys nobody bloody doing anything?My wife is always sweaty"

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

A reminder: As of today to enter &/or leave the village you WILL need your Vaccine passport, a letter showing your address (utility bill, summer flower fair voters card etc) and proof you're a tory voter.
Happy freedom day @BorisJohnson.
#COVIDIOTS #COVID19 #mondaythoughts

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

@SteelDalek1 We tried booking Hurst to appear at the 'Pat Sharp Community Centre' here in Feltching Green Village. Sadly he turned it down when he heard Jim Davidson was on the bill. His agent said something about him having to be the biggest bigot on the program.

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

@BorisJohnson Dear Boris. Now that Covid is finishing can you please help us? A protest is taking place today in Feltching Green to demand that something is done about the heatwave. Mr Hardwick, the organiser says "It's too bloody hot. Why is nobody doing anything? My wife is constantly sweaty

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

Sadly, due to COVID regulations the game will NOT be shown in the Pat Sharp Community centre. Tickets will be refunded.
However, the 24inch TV will be left on in the main hall which you can watch through the window at your leisure. Thank you.

#ITAENG #EnglandvsItaly #England

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

Hello Villagers.
If you're heading down to the Man-At-Arms pub to watch England on their newly installed 32inch TV, please be aware that women are not be allowed entry after 8pm to the mens lounge.
Please watch it at home.
Thank you.
#itsnotcominghome #England #EnglandvsItaly

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

We're all getting in the mood here in Feltching Green!
Come on the football!!
Our team are the winners!!
Kick the ball and get the goal!!
#ENGGER #Euro2021 #EnglandvGermany

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

#OneBritainOneNation

[The Jase 🐶 🎸 🎥 @jasemonkey]

We don't need no thought control. #OneBritainOneNation

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

@EmmaKennedy

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

Watching the footy?
Why not pop down to the Pat Sharp Community Centre & crowd into the newly refurbished Zoe Ballroom to watch the NEW 34inch FULL HD Plasma BUSH TV. The cubs will be selling Sausage rolls in the car park to the over 75's.
#ENGCRO #EnglandvsCroatia #ItsComingHome

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

Live in Feltching green? Watching the footy? Why not head down to the Man-at-Arms this afternoon for an amazing deal on a Mixed grill. It's buy 7 get 1 half price for the over 75's between 2:15p & 2:20pm. Snap up a deal while it lasts!
#ENGCRO #EnglandvsCroatia #ItsComingHome

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

🇬🇧@LozzaFox Good Luck today #LawrenceFox from everybody here in Feltching Green Village. We know you can do it! Folks, don't #VoteConservative, don't #VoteLabour or @CountBinface. Vote for forward thinking. Vote for patriuism. Get on your socks & vote for the fox!
#voted #britian

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

@lozzefox Oh no. These are for the Bi elections. We're totally behind you for the London mayoral role and if you ever wanted to come to Feltching and run we'd vote you in! After 70 years this is Mr Winkles last election so there is a slot available. Please fill our slot big man ❤️@lozzafox

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

@lozzefox @LozzaFox We're all behind you big man! 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

@LozzaFox Good luck today from everybody here in Feltching Green village. We know you can make London British Again and really sort out the NHS! Don't #VoteConservative or #VoteLabour .
Get on your socks, and Vote for Lawrence Fox!
#LawrenceFox #voted #Elections2021 #AngryBirds

[Feltching Green Village Council @FeltchingGreen]

🇬🇧@LozzaFox Good Luck today #LawrenceFox from everybody here in Feltching Green Village. We know you can do it! Folks, don't #VoteConservative, don't #VoteLabour or @CountBinface. Vote for forward thinking. Vote for patriuism. Get on your socks & vote for the fox!
#voted #britian