Sean Burns

not shutting the fuck up when I should. he/him

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

Pacing around my apartment like a caged animal while I wait for my bedding to dry

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

Just heard a kid at the park say “I thought we said no alliances!” And I have a feeling he’s about to learn some harsh truths about the rules of war.

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

It’s the first day of Fall. You’re driving with your windows down, the smell of the air is somehow more crisp than yesterday. ‘Come On Get Higher’ by Matt Nathanson comes on your local radio station. “This song sucks,” you say aloud to yourself.

[Brian Olson @acunabatflip]

5 years apart

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

I wanna meet the guy who decided the gym locker room trash is the perfect spot to throw out two 750s of Yellow Tail Chardonnay (with cups)

[AriZona Iced Tea @DrinkAriZona]

hbd willem

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

Is somebody gonna match my freak? (Smoking a cigarette outside the bar and lying about it)

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

I didn’t originally want Max when I was looking for cats. I had my eyes on other ones, but he wouldn’t stop playing with my shoes. Guys been with me for 5 years and hasn’t touched a shoe since he walked in my door. I got conned.

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

Jesus, as a teen, was likely smoking weed behind CVS.

[Michael Kandel @K_A_N_D_E_L]

happy father's day to my dad, who once texted me this

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

BIRTHDAY BOY! BIRTHDAY BOY!!!!

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

Oh, Poot Lovato wasn’t at the Met Gala? Then why should I gaf?

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

It’s going to be a Black Eyed Peas summer, and if you don’t know what I mean by that well - ahaha let’s just say - neither do I

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

Well it took exactly 1 hour of me laying out in 70°+ weather to become obsessed with Kali Uchis

[wint @dril]

the pillsbourghy dough boy, seems to me, is an absolute weakling, with little to nothing going on upstairs, in terms of IQ. A redundant bore

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

On a Zoom call during an earthquake like

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

I DONT WANT TO WORK TODAY. I WANT TO BE SURROUNDED FOR MILES BY TREES AND DEAFENED BY AN OMINOUS HUM

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

It’s pouring rain. My cat is curled up on my lap while I work. I’ve consumed enough caffeine to kill a bull elephant. I am at peace.

[Sean Burns @FoxySeanBurns]

Happy Easter