GeriatricParentals

40+ first time parents to 2 children under 2. Geriatric parents & proud. A new life began at 40 and it didn't involve a motorbike, just a crazy ride.

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

When you inadvertently do a ‘French Tuck’ on your toddler after potty training. I immediately think of one show! 🌈🌈🌈

#QueerEye #frenchtuck @jvn @QueerEye #yes #rockinthelook #geriatricparentals #toddler #pottytraining

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

Today is the day I fish my car keys out of a toilet... that has pee in it. From a toddler. Happy days.

#geriatricparentals #pottytraining #toddlers #toddlerlife #mumlife #toilettraining

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

Potty training week. 1.
Rug: 0
Pissy floors: lost count at 7

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

Potty training ideas for a stubborn toddler? Anyone?! #pottytraining #ToddlerInChief #parentlife #allthetantrums #peeandpoo #funandgames #geriatricparentals

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

My daughter, 20 month old Beatrice just said her first two syllable word - duggee! @HEYDUGGEE

#soproud #geriatricparentals #fan #20monthsold #firstwords #toddler

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

Watermelon and salmon. That’s what the child wants to eat.

We. Have. Neither.

Send help. Incoming tantrum... 🤦🏼‍♀️

#FirstWorldProblems #geriatricparentals #dinnertimerequests

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

Fuck. Oldest small person knows #greensleeves 🍦🚐
.
#geriatricparentals #parenting #parentingfail #icecreamvan #children #parents #momlife #dadlife #parenthacks

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

No. I did not just hide in the kitchen and eat an ice cream all by myself... #selfish #sugarhitformummy #treats #toddlerlife #livingwithtoddlers #geriatricparentals

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

“Don’t wipe your willy then wipe your face’
- the things I hear myself saying. #toddlerlife #wetwipetales #topparenting #geriatricparentals

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

My 2.5 year old pronounces chocolate ‘cock’

🤦🏻‍♀️😳 #FML

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

#sheerjoy #friyay #toddlerlife #toddlerinchief #perth #spingtime

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

Happiness is finding a ‘slightly’ out of date custard slice in the fridge and scoffing it down hiding behind the kitchen cupboards so you don’t have to share with child no.1. 💛🙌🏼😳

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

Today is a tough day in the office. Tantrums, tough love and fishing for ambulances in the stinky outside drain.

#icanthinkifbetterfridays #toughdayintheoffice #tantrumsandtoughlove #getiatricparentals

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

All quiet in the GP house this afternoon. Everyone is napping. Wes, Bea, a hungover papa...

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

Kinder related fridge raid incident. It’s frickin’ 8am. #toddlerlife #fridgeraider #kinder

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

@Ivf_ing_babies Amazing news. Well done to all 🙌🏼

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

Ultimate toddler morning. Tantrums about breakfast. Spied his lunch of sausage and mash. #meltdown ensued. Sausage and mash, complete with gravy, carrots and sprouts were devoured... along with his original serving of porridge afterwards. #growinglad #notlookingforwardtothenappy

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

Literally have spent months training the word fuck out of the parental vocab and no.1 child sounds like he’s saying it all by himself. #godammit

What he’s trying to say is ‘park’ but try telling that to strangers when he’s swearing at them.

#firstwords #phonetics #fark

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

Thank you to the lovely old dear that just rang my doorbell to ask me about my religious beliefs. At this point in time I'm totally blaspheming about the fact you have woken my kids up...

[GeriatricParentals @GeriatricParent]

Me? Just taking the two children aged two and one to the Toysrus closing down sale... yup crazy idea. Especially as one was free range....

#smashandgrab #shoppingwithtoddlers #itseemedlikeagoodidea