Elan Goldstein

the official account of elan goldstein

[Chase @bueller1247]

If you think I don’t wear thongs, you must’ve never seen me on the shore.🩴

[Elan Goldstein @GoldsteinElan]

Tom Brady was a day 3 pick 🐐#Legendary

[Elan Goldstein @GoldsteinElan]

@TaylorMadeGolf Elan Goldstein

[Heisman @HeismanTrophy]

Congratulations to the 2024 Heisman Trophy finalists, @oregonfootball QB Dillon Gabriel, @CUBuffsFootball CB/WR Travis Hunter, @BroncoSportsFB RB Ashton Jeanty and @CanesFootball QB Cam Ward! #HeismanTrophy #MoreThanATrophy

[Elan Goldstein @GoldsteinElan]

Nothing has been the same since Wii fit told me I was obese

[Barstool Colorado @CUBarstool]

This goes so hard.

[Elan Goldstein @GoldsteinElan]

It's a pretty pathetic feeling to take a poop and your feet are dangling from the toilet

[Elan Goldstein @GoldsteinElan]

@c3youngman Congratulations. Sko

[Chase @c3youngman]

There was nothing fun about that in fact

[Chase @c3youngman]

I will never believe in anything ever again

[Barstool Colorado @CUBarstool]

IYKYK

[Elan Goldstein @GoldsteinElan]

Is cereal a ...

[HasbullaHive 🐐 @HasbullaHive]

The Lakers WILL make the playoffs

[Elan Goldstein @GoldsteinElan]

I now what it feel like to stare death in the face

[Elan Goldstein @GoldsteinElan]

Kiss me I'm Jewish ☘️

[Elan Goldstein @GoldsteinElan]

It's really hard to dribble a basketball in your dreams

[Elan Goldstein @GoldsteinElan]

Everyone needs a peanut butter spoon

[Elan Goldstein @GoldsteinElan]

Nothing hits quite like a gusher

[Elan Goldstein @GoldsteinElan]

"A grandmother in her early 60s, ran a methamphetamine ring through her extended family. Cooking methamphetamine is messy."

[Elan Goldstein @GoldsteinElan]

Like if you want to see me tweeting more